Full Moon
by CherryWolf713
Summary: The second I saw him I was in his arms, crushed to him so hard that not even a single inch of space existed between our bodies. I had only needed that quick glimpse to know that my memory did him no justice; he was perfection in a stone casing.
1. It's Not Enough

**I know my summary didn't say much so I'll explain some more : I picked up right where Jacob opens his door in 'New Moon' and smells the vampire, who as we know turned out to Alice, but my story twists there cause Alice isn't there for Jacob to smell. Read to findout more... **

**This is the first fanfic I've posted in about 4 or 5 years and I'm a little out of the loop, so keep that in mind - be gentle! **

**Enjoy :) **

**Disclaimer : All belongs to the great Stephenie Meyer**

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Jacob released me automatically , reaching for the door.

_Wait_, I wanted to say. _Just a minute_. But I was still locked in place, listening to the echo of Edwards voice in my head.

"Be happy..."

Without looking at me, jacob said calmly, "lets get you inside - it's been a rough day."

I nodded silently and stared forward as I unlatched my own door and climbed out of his car. My house looked dark to me, almost scary as I started up the walk, wishing I was anywhere but here. I knew Charlie wouldn't be here and the knowledge left me shaken and un-glued. I felt Jacobs' hand on my arm and looked up, staring into his thoughtful eyes.

"Keys, Bella?"

Confused, I glanced around and slowly drew the conclusion and backtracked, wondering how we ended up in front of the door so quickly. I cleared my throat and nodded. "Um, yeah, keys..."

It took longer than normal it seemed, for me to get the door open; I wasn't sure if it was due to my shaking hands or a attempt to keep from entering the cold and dark house. I couldn't figure out what was wrong with me, I had been doing so good lately. With Jacob's help I was finally seeing the wold again, finally patching up my heart. The hole had been getting cleaner and cleaner, slowly scabbing over.

But with one look at my house, everything seemed to suddenly start to rip apart.

"Bella..."

I heard Jacob's shaky voice and looked up, noticing we were in the kitchen and he was pacing in front of the sink. He suddenly stopped and strode quickly over to me, engulfing me in his large, warm embrace.

"I love you."

The hole in my heart suddenly burst open, ripping my newly healed skin into pieces as his emotional words hit me full force. I could feel the shaking start and knew the sobs would be right behind them. The whole ride over here I had contemplated if loving Jacob would be enough to make my heart happy but it wasn't I finally realized; loving Jacob would finally be the end to my tortured heart's existence.

I did love him, I truly did. But not the way he wanted. And not the way he deserved. And the longer I let him delude himself into thinking that someday, I may, the guiltier I would feel until my heart just finally stopped beating.

I opened my mouth to protest my side but stopped, realizing the sobs escaped first. I shook my head and pushed out of Jacob's embrace before he really understood what was going on. I could feel his eyes on me as I turned and leaned onto the table, trying to steady my crying so I could finally plead my case.

"Bella..." His voice was soft and understanding as he reached for me again, wrapping an arm around my shoulder. "I know Edward hurt you-"

I jerked violently away as _his _name was mentioned. The irioney was not lost on my hysterical-headed mind at all; here I was, about to push away someone who loved me whole-heartely to save my own heart from exploding.

I was Edward and Jacob was my Bella. I was gonna rip a hole in his heart just like the one oozing in my own chest. I felt retched and sick to my stomach when he reached for me again, finally finding my voice to cry out, "don't touch me."

Even from my distance I could feel his body stiffen and his hand pause in mid-air. I squeezed my eyes shut and breathed out of my mouth, pushing the puking sensation downward. After a long minute I reopened my eyes, thankful that Jacob hadn't moved yet - it helped me gain my courage and composure.

"What did I do?" he asked finally, his voice soft and confused.

I swallowed hard and, after licking my lips, I finally pushed past my mouth, "I can't do this if you're touching me."

I think he finally realized which way I had made my mind up cause the room became suddenly still once more. I was almost convienced he had left when I turned around, only to find him turned away, leaning on my counter. I saw his elbows shivering and then heard the low creak as my kitchen counters protested to his grip.

I rubbed my tongue against the roof of my mouth, fighting to be able to control it. After the third try, I was able to start. "Jacob-"

"Don't Bella," he told me quietly, his voice hard. "I don't want to hear it."

Tears sprung my eyes again but I fought them back fiercely, determined to get through this. "I need to say this, Jake." I stopped to take in a deep breath but it was cut off when Jacob was suddenly in front of me, crushing me against.

"You don't _have _to say anything Bella," he argued fiercly, running his hands through my hair. "We can both just be quiet now and nothing has to change."

I tried to shake my head but Jacob held me tight and wasn't willing to let me go. I made do with speaking and forced past my cold lips, "yes I do. I-"

"No, Bella, _no!_" Jacob suddenly roared, shoving away from me and spinning around. I clumsenly caught my balance and watched as he grasped at his hair and breathed deeply.

A slight tremor or fear gripped me before I pushed it back down, reminding myself that this was Jacob, _my Jacob_, and that he would never hurt me. Not even the way I was about to hurt him.

"I still love him..."

"Screw Cullens!" Jacob shouted, turning back to me and taking my shoulders into his hands and leaning down, looking right into my eyes - even though I was trying my best to avoid his.

"He left you Bella!" he argued. "He cared more about his own damn feelings than yours! He doesn't deserve your love!"

Fierce heat forced through my body, making me almost hiss with the pure emotion suddenly flowing through my cold and barren body. I didn't even try to push Jacob's hands off my shoulders, I knew they wouldn't budge even if I tried, but I let loose on him with my words.

"He cared more about my feelings than you'll ever know!" I suddenly screamed, much more louder than I had intended. Jacob, taken back by my outburst, leaned his face away but didn't remove his arms. I could feel my breath starting to pick up again, my hands starting to shake once more as I shook my head, remembering that day in the woods much more clearly than I wanted to at this moment.

"More than I'll ever know..." I whispered, placing my hands over my face and letting the tears come freely now. I finally understood why Edward tossed me off the way he did, it's also the same reason I was doing the same thing to Jacob : the longer we drew it out, lured them on, the harder we would hurt them in the end.

And the worst he could have done was let me turned.

I slowly looked up into Jacob's eyes and told him gently, "I'm sorry..."

I saw Jacob swallow multiple times and clench his jaw before whispering back, "and if I wait?"

He let me shrug out from under his arms as I backed up and wrapped my own arms around my waist. I stared down at the floor before answering in my broken voice, "it's not gonna change...I'll still love him - no matter how he feels about me."

"And how do you feel about me?"

"Jake-" I begged, looking up toward the ceiling, my eyes still tearing up.

"No, Bella, I wanna know," he stressed, still eyeing me. "The truth."

I paced backwards until I knew I was near the living room entrance and turned, leaning into the doorframe, bracing my self for what I was about to say.

"Bella," Jacob whispered, not moving an inch but still holding his ground. "Do you love me too?"

"Yes," I mouthed, but I knew Jacob heard me with his excellent hearing. "Yes, ok," I repeated, louder this time, turning to face him. "Are you happy?!" I accused, storming up to him to continue ranting. "Here I am, standing here hurting you while you look at me like I can do no wrong. But you're wrong cause I do harm you! I shouldn't have leaned on you like I did when I knew I could never give you what you want!"

"How do you know what I want?!" Jacob tossed back. He saw my 'well-duh' look and rolled his eyes before adding, "but I might want other things too. Maybe I want you to be happy, with me. Who needs it all?"

I softened my tone and reached up, caressing his cheek sadly. "My Jacob...my sweet Jacob...you _deserve _it all," I whispered, finally pulling my hand away. "And I can't give you that."

"I don't care!" he whispered hotly, placing both his hands on my face and staring into my eyes. The devastating hurt lurking below the surface, the hurt he was trying so hard to push down, made me take in a deep breath. Just that little glimmer in his eyes proved to me that I was doing the right thing cause, sooner or latter, I would hurt him over this.

And I never wanted that hurt to be more than just a glimmer.

"I do care, Jake..._I do care_," I told him finally. I gently pulled his hands away and he let me, his face going emotionless. I knew the hard jaw was the first hint of his callous remarks to come and I braced myself for the pain they would bring, slamming my eyes shut. I was breaking him and he deserved to rant, to let his healing start.

Maybe if I had fought back with Edward...

I cleanched my eyes even tighter and held in the sob that thought brought. I waited patiently but nothing happened. I finally took in a deep, rattled breath and opened my eyes, finding myself standing alone in the kitchen. I could hear the wind blowing outside through the open door for a few beats before the loud howl reached my ears.

I covered them with my hands and leaned down, trying to block the anguished cry from my head.

_I did that to him_, I thought, doubling over even more as I sobbed openingly. I laid there on the kitchen floor till I was empty - inside and out. I'd cast my sun away forever it seemed. Edward was gone and now Jacob was too. My eyes started to daze and I fell into the sleep-less sleep, knowing I was right back to how I was those months ago.

I was broken.

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**S****o...if you actually made it to the bottom of this, please let me know what you think, even if it's not praise - I promise I won't cry :)**


	2. Dreams and Heartache

**A/N : I know this chapter is slightly smaller than the last one but don't worry - chapter 03 is bigger. **

**Also, I just wanted to thank everyone who had reviewed my first chapter **_**: jennyx00, Rachel657062, bloodsinger, alittlebitwarped, Almondimply**_**, and **_**Teenage Hope**_**. You guys are the best!**

**Disclaimer : If I could own Edward and Bella I would, but alas I don't. Hell, I would take ANY of the characters, except maybe Jacob...well, maybe I would keep pre-werewolf Jacob...**

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**Chapter 02**

_I could feel the cold, perfectly smooth fingers trace my face tenderly for a beat before the linoleum was no longer under me. The perfect body held me tenderly and tightly at the same time as lean arms enclosed me in a perfect alcove of stone. _

"_My bella...how could I let it come to this..." His breath traveled over my skin and left goose bumps in it's wake, the sensation more real to me than anything these past months. The velvet voice soothed my frazzled nerves some and I heard a sorrowful moan escape from what I believed was my own throat before air was rushing around my whole body as I picked up._

-

I awoke from my hazy dream slowly, new tears pricking my eyes as I remembered the pure agony in his velvet voice as he said my name. My mind seemed to love to torture me with unfulfilled fantasies. I finally understand why he left me, why he broke it off before it got too serious, yet my heart still can't seem to let him go.

I took in a shaky breath and opened my eyes to a dark room. The tears made it harder to adjust and I just laid perfectly still, waiting for my vision to clear up. My hands dug into the comforter wrapped around my body as I tried to steady my breathing.

Realization slowly dawned in my mind and I sat up, groggily rubbing my eyes clear of the last few tears that remained there. I finally viewed my own room in the darkness; my bed underneath my frail body, my favorite comforter wrapped snugly around myself. Confusion slowly over-took my numbing pain for the moment and I was able to calmly stand up and look all the way around my room.

The last thing I remembered was collapsing on the kitchen floor, listening to Jacob's painful howl get fainter and fainter as he ran away. Even now I could almost make myself still hear his cries when the thought graced my mind and I braced myself for the pain, breathing out of my mouth until I got better control of my emotions. My room looked exactly the same as I remembered it but I seemed oddly out of place standing there, feeling like I was just a ghost intent on haunting the house, pretending to be alive.

I had no memory of coming up the stairs or climbing into my bed, nor did I remember ever even waking up while downstairs, except for the lingering hazy dream nipping at my emotions.

_How did I get up here?_

"Dad..." I finally answered myself, instantly regretting that he had to see me like that once more. I knew deep down in my bones that it was hard enough for him the first time around - I didn't think him nor I might actually come out of this second time whole; not that I had went into this new-bout of depression anywhere near being whole.

A cold breeze blew across my arms and I shivered, inhaling the cool scent of rain wafting in from the open window. Instantly I pictured him in my minds eye, climbing through the opening like he had did countless times, a half smile tugging at his lips when he hopped through - caused by his amusement of sneaking around, he had once confided in me.

I could feel the unnatural turn in my breathing pattern and staggered quickly forward, nearly tripping over my own feet in an effort to slam the window shut before I started to gasp with pain brought on by the memory. That window hadn't been opened since the last time _he _climbed through it, and I wasn't about to leave it open now. My fingers slipped off the latch more than once before I finally got it slammed shut and stumbled back, eyeing it warily from my bed.

I ran a shaky hand through my hair and stood up once more, going for my door. I walked dazed down the hallway and steps, ending up in the kitchen. Ignoring the tremor in my eye as the memories filtered through my mind, I headed for the sink slowly, almost in a daze. I pulled down a plastic cup, not trusting my shaking hands for a glass, and filled it up slowly with cold water. I forced the tap water down my throat, not allowing myself to gag as it sloshed into my stomach. I was still swallowing when I caught the front door hanging wide open in the corner of my eye.

I knew full well that Charlie would never leave our front door wide open, not with him being a cop. I swallowed the last sip of water with difficulty and slowly placed the cup on the counter. The fear started to build in my body but I made my frozen feet step forward, edging me closer to the open screen door. I finally reached the handle and stepped through the doorway hesitantly, looking around. It took me less than a second to notice that my truck was the only vehicle in the driveway and I shivered, suddenly throwing my body into gear and dragging the door shut, latching the bolt.

I raced back up the stairs, knowing that the only reason I was running was not just because Charlie's police cruiser wasn't in the driveway - meaning I was home alone - but because it hinted to the fact that maybe Charlie had not been the one to carry me upstairs.

Someone else had been in my house tonight.

As soon as I shut my bedroom door I felt better, like it somehow protected me from my fright downstairs. I backed away, keeping my eyes on the door, somehow seeming to will myself into believing that if I just kept doing this, kept looking at the old wooden door, nothing would be coming to get me. My heart rate slowed down finally and I let my eyes linger from my door, turning to glance out my window and froze, instantly throwing my back up against the wall.

"Oh my-" I cut my scream off as I got a look as the person sitting on my windowsill. The wind gently blew around their body, the open window letting in the misty rain that was still clinging in their hair. It sparkled in the shafts of moon filtering in, forming a blanket of shadow to take place around their form.

Dark, piercing eyes were glued to my face intently; so much that when I gazed into them, my whole world tilt, sending my body crashing toward the floor.

**TBC**

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**I hope you guys liked it. Please review and let me know what you think! I have the next few chapters done already I just have to go back through them and fix my typo's and all that (my personal hell - I always miss a few and don't see them till it's posted!!) but I should be posting chapter 03 within the next few days. So review, review, review before the next chapter is posted:)**


	3. Love Hurts

1**A/N : I feel so honored by all of your great reviews!! As I promised, chapter three is much longer than chapter two - I think it's the longest one as of yet, actually. I took special consideration with this chapter so I hope you all enjoy it. Hopefully there won't be any typo's cause I went back and threw in some new stuff at the last second, but if there are I apologize!**

**Also, the song at the bottom of this chapter is by Incubus - one of my favorite bands. If you want to check it out, go to ****It's track number #5, by the way. **

**Again, thanks to all my fabulous reviewers : **_**la chiave al mo cuore, Rachel657062, Laughing Dragoness, flamingo1325, abovetherim, wishingstar17, Kionaka, xLoopiloox, Mrs.EdwardCullen16, Cassie Rae, **_**and **_**Tallyon**_**. And all you guys who put my story on alert too - I appreciate it :)**

**Disclaimer : As always, I don't own them, but I can dream...**

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**Chapter 03 - Love Hurts**

Once again I awoke in my bed, but this time there was a slight draft of light starting to filter in through my window. I laid in bed, slumber still trying to grasp at my mind for a few beats before I gasped and jumped out of my bed, nearly busting my butt on the floor in my haste. I frantically searched my window but found it shut.

_I was dreaming_..._it was just a dream_, I told myself, fighting to force the knowledge down my throat in a effort to stop my heart from trying to escape through my ribs.

I finally got myself breathing deeply and looked around the rest of my room, seeming to find nothing out of place. With a half-sob and half-shy, I walked over to my window and looked out of it, finding Charlie's police cruiser already gone, an idle thought wondering through my brain reminded myself that Charlie had mentioned he was going fishing with Billy early in the morning.

_He must __have__ carried me up here last night then I dreamed of my visitor. _I refused to let my mind linger on just who that visitor had been and pushed it as far away as I could.

I closed my eyes for Charlie, knowing my break-down last night was going to cause him tremendous pain. Leaning forward and placing my forehead against the cold glass of my window, I closed my eyes with fatigue, no matter that I had just woken up. Maybe it would be better this time if I _did _leave Forks and go live with my mother for a while. Renee was better equipped to handle my emotional insanity than Charlie was; and it wouldn't hurt to put some distance between myself and all the memories here.

Than maybe my heart could finally heal.

I opened my eyes finally and took in a deep breath, letting my fingers trace the cool glass in front of me.

"I guess this is goodbye..." I said to myself faintly.

With my decision made I backed away from the window and turned around, slowly making my way downstairs. I had just put my foot on the first step when I heard the murmuring from the kitchen. My breath hitched in my throat as I strained my ears, finally making out the hushed voices.

"You scared the hell out of her!" she hissed, clearly angered with her companion.

"What was I supposed to do?!" he tossed back angrily. "I get a call saying Bella _jumped _off a cliff and was possibly _dead_..." The last word hung in the air, his obvious pain tangible, almost touchable with weight and other unsaid words.

I was frozen to my spot, still in mid step and unable to let that breath out as their voices rang in my ears.

"And then I come here to find her on the floor...you didn't see how she looked..." His voice was so full of pain and remorse that it hit me full force. If my body hadn't been made of ice I would have fell back with the sheer force of his emotions.

Suddenly his voice turned sharp. "Alice? Alice, what are you seeing?!"

My head was pounding from a lack of oxygen but I continued to hold it, unable to move in case the slightest sound would make them go away. If I was to wake up yet again, seeing this was a dream too I might actually go over the edge so I stayed frozen still, my hands clenched to the railing.

"Alice!" he questioned again, his voice almost frantic now. I heard the silvery female voice mumble something faintly before he sucked in a deep, sharp breath. I had learned to deal with vampire's with patience but I was nearing the point of desperation, needing to know what the small, pixie-like girl had seen.

Then I finally heard Alice say numbly, "she's gonna leave Forks...she's leaving, Edward."

All hell broke loose when his name was said, when Alice finally named Edward. Maybe I _had _talked myself into thinking it was all a dream, or maybe my mind had finally started to collasp from the lack of oxygen, but either way when Alice let that little word out I could feel the sob wretch it's self out of my chest.

I'm sure they had time to stop, time look at each other and even ponder the noise before Alice was suddenly at the bottom of the stairs then just a suddenly right by my side. But to my human mind it all happened before the noise was even all the way out of my mouth.

"Bella..." she half-whispered, almost looking hesitantly at me, like she was wondering if I was about to throw myself down the steps or something. Her face looked more striking than ever in the shadowy light, making her ghostly white skin almost shimmer like she was standing right out in the sun.

"Are you really here?" I mouthed, unafraid to even say the real words. Alice nodded once and I was suddenly free, able to fling my arms around her and crush myself against her small body. I felt her arms automatically enclose me back, hugging me almost as tightly as I was her for a few moments. But then the back of my neck tickled with the apprehension that she was no longer happy at the sight of me but somehow upset, forcing me to loosen my grip and look back at her face.

"Bella..." she repeated softly, loosening her arms so that I could lean back even more. She reached up and wiped a stray tear away from my cheek with her small finger before adding, "you scared us."

I didn't hear the stairs creak or even get one clue that he was heading up them until he was suddenly there, standing just 5 steps below me and Alice. The space between us was suddenly thick and heavy, to such a point that I was sure a knife wouldn't even be able to penetrate it. I forced my eyes shut, knowing that if I turned, if I looked at him, I was going to loose it, right there in the hallway.

"I think you need to sit down," Alice gently ordered me, taking my elbow and turning me around, leading me back to my room. I felt myself be placed on the bed and I obliged, still keeping my eyes closed; even though I knew it was childish and immature, I couldn't make myself open them. I felt something cold brush down beside me on the bed and I knew it was it was Alice who had sat beside me cause I knew with absolute certainty that Edward had just knelt slowly down in front of me. My stomach clenched when the coldness neared my knee, alerting me that he had attempted to place a hand on me but thought better of it.

"Bella..."

I squeezed my eyes even harder at the sound of his voice so near. My breath suddenly became ragged but I kept my composer, forcing the fleeting thought of how close his lips must be to mine out of my head. That is, until he spoke those words and I gave in, not being able to deny the agony that pulled at me from his voice.

"Please, Bella, open your eyes, love."

The second I saw him I was off the bed and in his arms, crushed to him so hard that not even a single inch of space existed between our bodies. I'm not sure who made the first move - if I had leaped into his arms of if he had pulled me off the bed, but I knew for sure that I was curled up in his lap, his body still crouched down on the floor; the exact spot from which he had been begging me a second earlier.

I had only needed that quick glimpse to know that my memory did him no justice; he was perfection in a stone casing.

Spiky, almost-messy bronze hair adoring his head, strong cheekbones framing his elegant nose, intensely deep eyes trained on my own face and my face alone, and full sensual lips; the last of which were raining kisses on me everywhere as he held me. My hair, my forehead, my cheeks, my neck - anywhere he could reach.

I kept my lips to myself but still clung to him despretly, my mind swimming in everything that was him. All the memories I had cuddled and stored away in my head seemed faded and thin in comparison to the actuality of what it was like to be back in his arms again; to smell his breath all around me, to feel his hard and perfect chest pressed up against my own. Even the coldness radiating off his skin sent me into a spiraling whirlwind of sensations that shook me to my very core. His hands on my body sent shivers up and down my spine, forcing goose bumps to form all over my skin, making me even more sensitive to his form.

But none of this compared to how it felt to hear his velvety smooth voice. It slid over my skin, covering my whole form in a cocoon of heat and passion so quickly and intensely that I nearly gasped. The full force hit me and I knew my previous memories, those moments when I had called his voice out of the recesses of my mind, could never, _ever_, compare with the real thing. I could hear him murmuring in my ears that he was sorry, that he was here now and never going away again. He swore over and over again that he was staying right by side no matter what, that even if I wanted him to leave he would fight tooth and nail to change my mind.

"I'll leave you two alone," Alice stated faintly, her voice slowly breaking into my haze.

I didn't need to look up to see that she was gone since she was more than capable to leave without my hearing. I felt Edward shift my body some, trying to bring me closer as if there was actually room to do so.

"I don't..." Edward gave up trying to say what he was going to and just hugged me once more, his arms holding me close as he inhaled deeply. I let him cradle me and just closed my eyes once more, enjoying the feeling of his body so close after it had been gone for so, so long.

"God...I've missed your smell so much," Edward murmured as he inhaled again, his face buried in my hair and shoulder.

I could feel my body tense and I knew from the sudden drop of my stomach that he sensed my hesitation. His right hand traveled up and cupped my check, gently pulling my face upward until I was I was barely just a fraction-of-an-inch away from his eyes and lips. I forced myself to keep control of my expression and looked away, trying to hide the pain I was sure was going to shine through my eyes anyway, no matter how composed the rest of my face was.

That was why he was here, the pull of my blood had been too much for him to bare.

_He didn't come back for me..._

The news busted my heart into a million pieces but I somehow remained perfectly still. The pain that now coursed threw my blood was ice cold and turned my skin and bones brittle, made my face and expression freeze instantly. I swallowed once, allowing only that little tremor move me.

"Bella..." Edward's voice was a whisper and a hammer all at once, trying to slip through my defenses before almost pulverizing them with razor-tipped pain. "Please tell me what you're thinking..."

I took in slow, deep breath before stating finally, my voice flat and even, "my blood called you - you didn't have a choice but to come back." I could almost feel the freezing cold coming off of it, turned to ice by my emotions.

"What?" I heard the complete confusion in his voice and braced myself to turn to his eyes as he added softly, "you think that's why I came back?"

"Isn't it?" I questioned, feeling like my shoulders would break with the strain of the fight against my frozen body to merely shrug.

Suddenly I was on the bed and Edward was up and moving, pacing angrily from one side of my room to the other, his eyes almost glowing in the dawning lights. He reminded me of a trapped tiger pacing it's cage, moving gracefully from bar to bar, tightly coiled anger fueling his movements. I watched him pace back and forth with wide eyes before he spun on me.

"If you think the only reason I'm here is that I didn't have a choice due to your blood then you-" Edward growled forcefully and slammed his fist down on my desk, knocking the legs out from under it, instantly crumbling it to the floor. I'm not sure if he heard the gasp escape my stiffened lips or not but suddenly he was back in front of me again on his knees, his hands gently cupping my face as he told me emotionally, "I might not have had a choice in coming back here, but it was because _I love you _too much to stay away." He let go of my face slowly and leaned down, burring his face into my abdomen and wrapping his arms around my waist.

Before I could stop myself my hands found his hair and I laced them through it, gently urging him to look up. One look into his eyes stopped whatever words I had on the tip of my tongue and I just stared at him, not being able to handle the pain I saw so clearly in those dark pools. He was open for me, baring it all right then.

"Why did you do it?" I asked softly, not being able to explain my question any more than that.

Edward took a deep breath before answering my questions with one of his own. "Why did you jump?" His question took me by surprise and I stopped, not understanding what he was saying at first, making him add, "why did you try to kill yourself?"

"I didn't," I insisted quickly, my mind putting two and two together. Suddenly it all seemed to fall into place and I said, "I was just cliff diving with Jacob."

"Cliff diving?" Edward repeated, his voice sounding on the brink of laughter or tears, of which I wasn't sure. He dipped his head once then reached up and took my face in his hands once more, his eyes and lips very close to mine.

"Bella...I thought you were dead..." His voice tripped over the last word before continuing, "you could've been - what were you thinking?!"

My voice was gone again and all I did was shrug, forcing Edward to take my shoulders and shake me. "What is wrong with you?!" he demanded, growling with hurt and frustration. "I asked you before I left to be careful, not to put yourself in danger!"

I could feel the small bubble of anger start to expand inside of me as he yelled. By the time the words were leaving my mouth I knew they would be hard. "Excuse me?"

But Edward didn't seem to hear me; he was already up once more and pacing again. "I was already on the phone buying tickets for Italy when I pulled up in your driveway-"

My head snapped up at that and I stood slowly, eyeing him closely.

"-convinced I was going to find you were dead. And then I see your door's wide open and I find you lying on the floor in the kitchen so far gone you can't even answer me."

_Italy_, my mind kept saying over and over. _He was going to go to Italy to see the Volturi_. The brief but horrorifying conversation we had had about the Volturi those long months ago reverberated through my head right then, making my heart beat in my ears, fear fill every inch of my being, and scolding anger burn through my veins.

'_You don't irritate the Volturi' Edward had said. 'Not unless you want to die-or whatever it is that we do.'_

Edward was still pacing when I came out of my flashback, his voice still angered as he was adding, "You even looked dead lying there and-"

The fear and anger erupted inside me at once, forcing me to storm over to him and grab the front of his shirt. He stopped instantly and opened his mouth to say who knew what when I nearly screamed at him, "Italy? I swear if you even dare _think _about doing that I will kill you myself! Do you hear me Edward Cullen?!"

Edward was taken by surprise and I think I even saw a little smile tweak the end of his lips before I shoved him away with all my strength, though he never even moved and inch. I paced to the other side of the room before growling myself and spinning to confront him once more.

"What right do you have to do that after what you said to me, after letting me believe you actually _loved _me-" I instantly saw the fire light in his eyes but continued on, "and then leave me like that?! You don't get to-to-" I was practically panting with my anger and I made a frustrating gesture with my hands before looking down, not being able to finish the sentence.

"Are you done yet?"

The question was stated very calmly and mater-of-fact enough to allow me to look back up again. I answered him plainly with a yes then suddenly couldn't breath due to the force which he crushed my body against his. His lips had taken mine eagerly and hungrily, muffling my mutual cry of anguish and relief. My need for air was almost enough for me to pull away but I held right there, not caring if my lungs exploded; Nothing was going to make me pull away from Edward now that I felt what it was like again to be kissed by him.

Edward finally wrestled his lips from mine and I took in a deep breath before losing it again when he moved on to my chin and kissed a path down my neck and back up, never once taking his smooth lips off of my fevered skin.

When his lips reached my ear he stopped and growled out fiercely, "I told you I had no intentions of living without you. Then _or _now." He placed his forehead against mine, keeping his face as close to mine as possible while not actually kissing me. His lips were still right beside mine and I could feel them brush when I opened my mouth slightly to take in a breath.

I swallowed slowly and asked finally, my voice raw with pain, "then why did you leave me?" The tears were right behind the question and I held them back as long as I could, forcing my jaw to clench while I waited for Edward to answer me.

"You don't know?" he stated plainly, rubbing his lips over mine gently, not fully turning it into a kiss but causing enough friction to send a shiver down my spine.

I thought I did but his statement stalled my reply. I carefully replayed all my options in my head and backed up a step, knowing I could never think straight while he was so close. He had told me he didn't love me, that he had gotten distracted, then I had finally came to the conclusion that he might have loved me once, but had felt different toward the end and let me go before it got worse, like I just did with Jacob.

Just the thought of his name in my mind triggered the memories of his face, heartbroken and in pain, to flash across my eyes. I quickly pushed that emotional wreck downward and turned back to Edward, telling him honestly, "I thought you didn't love me anymore."

His eyes closed and he looked away, bowing his head before saying softly, "I don't think-" Suddenly he shook his head and looked back up saying, "no, I _know _I'll never love anyone as much as I love you. It's not possible."

The lingering pieces of ice that were still in my body started melting away so fast it could've caused a river to overflow in my veins. I opened my mouth to speak but instead just stared at him. He had said earlier that he loved me but this time it actually broke through my barriers and I felt it. Everything I had been feeling came crashing down on my shoulders and I blinked, slowly reaching up and placing my hand over my mouth, realizing what I had done, what I had gone through because I doubted how he had felt.

I slowly backed away further and reached behind myself, feeling for the bed without looking away from Edwards' emotional face. He stood still and let me retreat, but I could see the strain in his eyes that my distance was causing him. But I had to know, I _had _to hear his story before I let my heart have any more hope.

"Tell me why," I questioned finally, my voice full of every emotion there was to have.

Edward nodded and settled in to tell his tale, seeming to release a sense of relief to finally get it off of his chest. I could see the tension in his shoulders start to relax as he explained.

"After your birthday I started to think about our future," he said cautiously, catching my eye for a brief moment before moving on. "I knew I loved you and wanted to be with you forever - there was never a question of that. But I knew deep down that I was being selfish and you deserved to live a normal life." He shrugged his shoulders and added simply, "you deserved to be a human."

I opened my mouth to argue but Edward stopped me with a look and I conceded, letting him finish before I took the chance to speak my opinion.

"I knew what you had told me but you don't understand Bella," he pleaded with me, his voice cracking some and his eyes deep with fear and guilt, "I could see the danger all around you and if I was _ever _the reason for that again, I don't know what-"

This time I wasn't able to hold myself in check and jumped up to argue. "That was not your fault!"

I didn't need Alice's psychic power or even Edward's own ability to read minds to know what he was talking about. I could still see James smiling face, reflected in all those mirrors, as he pleasantly described killing me like we were neighbors talking about the weather. I had my suspicions that Edward had blamed himself for everything that had happened but I never thought it would fester and get to this point.

"If you didn't know me-" he tried to explain but I cut him off again, stressing, "James would have still been going through Forks!"

Edward did almost the same exact frustrated move I had earlier before tossing back angerly, "he only tracked you cause I showed how much you meant to me! If I hadn't-"

"Has it ever occurred to you that you saved my life?" I screamed right back. I paused and repeated it again, this time finally looking him right in the eyes as I told him emotionally, "you saved me..."

"But if I hadn't tempted James he would have never been looking at you."

I looked down and quietly shook my head, telling Edward after a sigh, "I wasn't talking about with James." When Edward stopped and looked at me, I continued, "I don't think I would've survived it here in Forks if I didn't have you." I shrugged and added to myself, "I know I can't survive it after you leave."

I was reminded of how good Edward's hearing was when he reached out and pulled me into his embrace then, wrapping his arm around my waist and holding me flat against his whole body.

"You're not the only one," he stated while caressing my cheek with his fingers before placing his own cheek against it. I breathed in deeply then, finding that I, like him with me, had missed his scent terribly. My arms were locked around his form so tightly that I thought I might loose circulation and I pressed my face into his chest.

After everything that had happened - the months apart, the pain, the anger - we were finally back where we needed to be; we were in each others arms. Before I could stop myself I replayed that day in the woods back in my head and cursed my soul for ever doubting our love.

"If I had known why you were saying those things..." My voice broke and I felt Edward snug me even closer, lifting my feet off of the floor and carrying me to the bed. I shook my head against his chest and added, as he settled us on top of the comforter, "if I had known I wouldn't have believed you...I would have fought for you."

He suddenly preoccupied himself with wrapping the blanket perfectly around me to shield myself from the coldness of his skin and I craned my neck back, looking up to his face. He'd had years and years to perfect his mask, to learn how to hide his emotions and feelings, but I had learned to read his subtle face changes and knew instantly that me not fighting for him hurt him much more than he was willing to admit.

"I'm a good liar," was all his he told me finally with a kiss to my forehead. But I still saw how much my belief in his speech upset him. I decided to let it go for now and nodded, making a promise to myself that I would not back down again, I would fight for us with everything I had. Snuggling back into his embrace I sighed and closed my eyes, my body giving in to the comfort his body offered.

"I love you...I'm not letting you go again," he vowed, wrapping his arms around me even tighter and settling down himself to get comfortable.

I nodded and held my tongue knowing that my heart was still to raw and _bleeding _to say how I felt, but needing to find a way to express it. Turning slightly in Edward's embrace, I reached my hand up and traced my fingers down his cheek, the same way he used to do it when we had first meet and he was still figuring out what I meant to him. I felt the slight up-turn on his lips and then felt them on each of my fingers, taking the time to give each of them attention, then to lightly brush his lips across my knuckles, palm and lastly my wrist.

By the time my hand was returned he had kissed nearly every inch of it and I found myself fighting back a yawn.

"Sleep Bella dear," he implored me gently.

"No, I'm not tired," I lied instantly, knowing full well that Edward would see through it but not being able to help doing so. I didn't want to miss one second of him being back, one second of his arms around me.

He gave a slight chuckle and added, "liar." Placing a kiss on the crown of my head he added, "it's very early still. Go on, I'll be here when you wake."

My fear suddenly rocket up into my throat and my voice shook when I asked, sounding so much like a small child after their parents had assured them their nightmare wasn't real, "promise?"

I felt the tension in his shoulders and knew if I looked up there would be evident pain in his face, probably for the rest of our time together whenever this would be brought up. But my fragile heart needed the confirmation one last time before I closed my eyes, one more time to make my breathing return to normal.

"I promise to be here everyday of forever from now on," he vowed with pure honesty and love in his voice.

"You know, that's probably not possible," I mumbled into his chest. "Alice will steal me away eventually."

Edward laid his cheek down against my forehead and responded, "when it comes to you, nothing's impossible for me.," ignoring the Alice remark. Before I could respond, like to remind him about his impossible attitude on the subject of me being turned into a vampire, he pulled my hand up, kissed it once more, than added, "sleep Bella."

I grumbled once more and he started to hum my lullaby suddenly, the tune instantly opening my eyes back open. The sweet tune was like heaven to my ears and I strained to hear every part of it after having been deprived. After humming the last note Edward whispered his undying love and kissed my forehead, sending me into to sleep.

-

_Sometimes when I'm alone I wonder,_

'_Is there a spell that I am under_

_Keeping me from seeing the real thing'?_

_Love hurts..._

_But sometimes it's a good hurt_

_And it feels like I'm alive_

_Love sings..._

_When it transcends the bad things._

_Have a heart and try me,_

_Cause without love I won't Survive_

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**I'm not sure when the next chapter will be posted - I've been struggling with it for some time now but I'm still not satisfied. But, as always, I'll try to make it within the next few days!**


	4. Vampire Take Out

**A/N : I got such GREAT reviews for the last chapter that I couldn't wait to post this one! As always, much appreciation to my reviewers, **_**LilMizzNae, abzz, jade dragon618, xLoopiloox, blonde-gal, jennyx00, bronzedoe, Laughing Dragoness, Pearledtears**_**, and **_**Quiet and Invisible. **_

**Plus a very, VERY**** special thank-you to **_**flamingo 1325 **_**and **_**obsessed over twilight **_**: your wonderful comments touched me. You guys rock:)**

**Disclaimer : I know, I know, I don't own 'em...**

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**Chapter 04 - Vampire Take Out**

I awoke to muted sunlight filtering into my eyes and stretched, smiling when I felt his body still right under me, the same exact spot it had been when I fell asleep.

"How did you sleep?" Edward asked, lifting a finger to play with my hair.

I thought back on the previous hours and answered with some surprise, "good...I slept good." I racked my brain and couldn't remember when I had slept that peacefully lately.

"I'm glad," he said finally, sounding like he wanted to aid more but was hesitating. Curious I looked up at him. Looking away from my eyes he asked finally, "have you been sleeping lately?"

I knew he got his answer the minute he looked into my eyes and I swallowed, turning to stare at my comforter. I hadn't wanted him to see me like that, to know how depressed I had been, how broken. Those first hours after Jacob had left and before we had talked were among my worst and I never wished for him to feel my pain.

"Bella..."

"What, uh, what did I say?" I asked evenly, starting to pick at my comforter so that I had an excuse to not look up at him. It was common knowledge that I talked in my sleep, especially when I was upset.

He knew what I was asking and admitted after a pause. "You cried a lot..."

He didn't need to finish the sentence for me to know that I been crying about Jacob; I could hear it in his tone. I continued to pick at my blanket and felt it rip under my fingers before they were pulled back from it, Edward's larger hand wrapped around mine.

"Do you want to talk about it?" he asked softly.

I shook my head no, still not looking up at him. I felt him pull me closer by my hand and I laid my back against his chest, letting my head fall to the right and I gazed out the window.

Edward simply held me, running his hands through my hair for what seemed like hours before he kissed the crown of my head and asked, "do you want breakfast in bed?"

The question came out of left field and I stirred, looking back at him. "You're gonna cook?" I questioned hesitantly.

"I was thinking more along the lines of going and picking it up." He smiled down at me. "I don't think anyone needs to be subjected to _that_."

I could feel a smile tugging at my lips and I gave in, earning a kiss on the lips in the process. Thinking it over, I stretched and sighed before saying, "mind if I cook here instead?"

"Whatever you want," he agreed automatically and happily. "You can have anything you want."

"Really?" I asked, turning back to him. "Anything I want?" He nodded and I thought for a beat before adding, "no matter what you think?"

I saw his eyebrows pull together and he stated with a more even voice, "with some conditions."

I sighed and knew he had caught my drift. He had made it very clear that the discussion of me becoming a vampire was over - and his decision stood, I was to stay human. A little voice in the back of my head, the same voice that was growing stronger and bigger everyday, argued that me becoming a vampire would solve a lot of our problems. And besides, I had made up the decision that I wanted it long ago. I almost mentioned this out loud when Alice suddenly appeared in my room.

"Alice," I exclaimed, startled.

She skipped over and sat on the edge of my bed, pouting. "It's been very lonely by myself. Entertain me, please."

I laughed briefly and leaned over, engulfing her for the second time in the day. "I've missed you," I added.

I could feel her eyes over my shoulder and turned to see her and Edward having a silent conversation, ending with Edward looking away, his face hardened by whatever she had been thinking. I wanted to ask what it was about but knew it was futile when he got that look on his face.

"How about we get some food into you while Edward gets some clothes and stuff for us?" Alice asked suddenly, her voice chipper as always. She stood up and pulled me off the bed with her.

I looked down at Edward and he sighed, standing up. It was clearly evident on his face that he did not want to leave me but Alice must have said something pretty convincing cause he scowled and shot her another look. Before he even looked my way I knew what he was going to say and I offered, "it's ok. Me and Alice can...visit."

I heard Alice snicker at my choice of words and Edward growled at her before leaning down, taking my lips gently. The kiss was tender and sweet and sad all at the same time, making a little ball of dread start to form in my stomach. Here it was just a few hours after his proclamation and he was leaving already.

But again, before he could say anything I forced a smile and told him, "you'll be back before you know it." I tried to make the smile reach my eyes but I'm pretty sure I failed since Edward placed his hand on the back of my neck and kissed me again, deepening it slightly more than the last, causing my heart to beat on double time and my breath to come out in a whoosh when he let me go.

He saw right through my facade and leaned in, promising into my ear, "I _will _be back." He pulled away finally and looked at Alice briefly before heading for my window and hopping out it. I held my breath for a count of ten before I let it out, knowing it would be shaky after I watched him disappear across my yard and hop into his car.

Alice came up behind me and threw an arm across my shoulder and suddenly asked, "can you order in breakfast like you do pizza?"

The true innocence in her eyes made me try and hide my laugh before giving up and telling her, "If you weren't a vampire you'd starve to death."

She just smiled happily and started to dance her way down the steps without making a sound, while I clamped down them after her, my bare feet sounding like combat boots in comparison. By the time I had made it to the kitchen she was perched on the counter and swinging her legs back and forth.

"So, what's for breakfast?" she asked.

I pondered that myself and walked over to the fridge and looked inside, careful to step over the spot where I had collapsed last night. I pulled out some eggs, sitting them on the counter. Alice, curious, picked one out of the carton and turned it all around before giving it a toss in the air and catching it effortlessly.

"You do realize these come out of a chicken's butt, right?" she asked suddenly.

"You drink bear blood and you think my eating of an egg is weird?" I tossed back.

Ignoring my question, Alice just said, "I don't eat bear; I prefer deer - or goat."

I sent her a mock frown. "Poor Bambi."

Alice for her part though, just grinned and continued to toss the egg up in the air, my eyes following it automatically.

"You know, those do break easily," I told her, not relishing the idea of cleaning up the mess if she were to actually drop it - which would be very unlikely.

Alice just smiled again and placed it back in the carton while I pulled out the frying pan and went around to her other side, starting up the stove and greasing the pan.

"He needs time, you know," she said suddenly, still swinging her legs.

It was obvious who she was talking about and I had a very good idea on what he needed time with also. I cracked the egg and dropped it into the pan, listening to the sizzle for a beat before telling her, "it would just be easier. I wouldn't be liability anymore."

"I see your point. And to be truthful, I'm pretty disgusted with the whole argument." Almost like she stating an after-thought to herself Alice added, "I've been flirting with the idea of changing you myself."

I nearly dropped my spatula as I turned full body toward her. "Oh my god Alice, do it!" I exclaimed, even throwing my wrist out toward her. "Bite me!"

Her eyes went wide at my reaction but she remained calm when she replied, "I didn't mean right now obviously."

I could feel my lower lip pout out and I knew I was employing one of Alice's own tricks. "But you'll change your mind if we don't do it now," I argued, even going as far as laying my head on her shoulder.

"No...I don't think I will," she said after a brief moment of contemplation. After giving my back a rub she said, "is something burning?"

"Oh!" I gasped, turning around and quickly flipping my eggs. Sending her a quick glance I accused playfully, "nice warning."

Alice just grinned wickedly. "I doubt you would've burnt the house down."

I rolled my eyes and finished cooking my eggs quickly, delivering them onto a plate, charred side down, and taking a seat at the table, Alice right with me. I picked up my fork and took a bite, chewing it slowly as I tried to think of a way to phrase my question.

"Alice?"

"Hmm?" she answered.

I used my fork and cut up another piece of but didn't take the bite, instead asking quietly, "how was he? You know, while we were apart."

She didn't seem surprised by my question but still thought carefully before telling me, "dead."

I looked up into her eyes sharply, my heart ramming my ribs just from her saying that word about him and she explained, "he wasn't Edward any more. He was empty, a shell. Not even Jasper could help him. And then he left."

"Left?" I repeated slowly. During the whole time Edward had been a vampire he had only left Carlisle once and that was when he rebelled and started feeding on humans. I knew how horrible he felt about that period of his past looked back down at my eggs again, not letting my mind go to _that _scenario.

Alice nodded. "He went to stay with some friends for a bit. I don't think I'll ever really know how bad it hurt him," she finished, eyeing me. "But...maybe you do?"

I just nodded, not being able to lift my eyes at the moment. She crossed her arms and leaned casually on them before starting again. "I checked in on you a few days after we left." I could feel the horror fill my face at the thought of that, knowing Edward could have read her mind and got it from her.

"Di-did he see me..."

"No," she answered. "As soon as he realized that the thought was about he recoiled back and got furious with me." She paused a beat then added, "I think seeing you would have been too much. He wouldn't chance it."

I could understand that and simply nodded again, playing with my food some more. Everything about that time had been painful.

"He'd pretty much made up his mind last week to come back for you," she stated suddenly, catching me off guard. Alice saw my startled look and smiled. "He gave himself a few more days to try, but it was useless and he knew it." Her smile disappeared and she kept going with, "and then you decided to suddenly take up extreme sports."

I sighed, practically throwing my fork on my plate. "It was stupid. I just...I just wanted to feel something, you know?" I thought about telling her about the voice but decided against it, feeling embarrassed.

"Well, with your track record I don't think-..." Alice suddenly trailed off and whipped her head toward the front door, her nose flaring. I had only ever heard Alice hiss or even growl once - she had acted remarkably human for a vampire up until now - so I was looking at her with complete shock when a hiss escaped her lips.

Before I could ask what was wrong my eyes suddenly widened even more when I heard the knock. _His _knock.

"Jacob," I breathed out, taking a quick look at the door then back at Alice.

Her eyes were drawn and suspicious. "What is he?" she asked. "I smelled him in your house earlier...and I didn't see him coming." Her face suddenly blanked for a second and I knew she was trying to get a picture from the future.

I opened my mouth, undecided on what to tell her when the knock came again, impatient this time. "Werewolf," I finally whispered, hearing Alice suddenly exclaim, "your gone. I-I don't know what's going to happen."

"What?" I had heard her slight fear when she had spoken and it made my hair stand on end. Alice had always been calm and collected but the thought of her powers failing had her shaken up. I was about to ask her what she meant by 'I was gone' when Jacob knocked a third time, sounding like he was trying to pound the door down.

I couldn't keep my eyes from the door and she saw, sending a questioning look my way before standing up.

"Alice," I tried, but all I could do was sit there helplessly. Then she was suddenly at the door, opening it and going out onto the porch. I scrambled out behind her, my breath coming out in a whoosh when I found Jacob on one side of my door frame and Edward on the other, both of them screaming predator as they stared each other down.

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**As always, I'd love to know what you think!**

**Melissa**


	5. Flirting With Danger

**A/N : I took a little longer to update with this chapter cause, frankly, I'm nervous about it - and for more than one reason. I've re-read it, like, 50 times and re-wrote certain scenes about the same amount, but at the end of day I just figured I had to just let it go and hope you guys like it. I tried to keep everyone in character but, I don't know...**

**Also, I want to give a slight warning. See, the last few nights I haven't been able to work on this story and I fear the murderous writers-block is creeping up on me (I just **_**knew **_**I was going to jinx myself, I knew it!!!) But don't worry too much - I already had 09 chapters written before this happened so I have some time to smack the crap out of it and send my writers-block away, crying for it's mommy. Also, it always helps if I have something else to work on while I clear my mind so I started to post my Gilmore Girls fic - hopefully that will work.**

**I'm really hoping tonight I'll be able to churn out that 10****th**** chapter, so keep your fingers crossed for me!!**

**Like always, I adore all my reviewers! The list is getting quite large - I feel so loved!! LoL :) But I have to give a special shout to **_**flamingo 1325 **_**cause you rock and I look forward to reading your reviews every time I sign on, checking my newest chapter!!**

**Ok, I'm done know - As always, enjoy and review, review, REVIEW!!**

**Disclaimer**** - Do I own Bella and Edward? Nope. But is Stephenie ever wants to sell them after the last book comes out later this year, I'll be at the first of the line (though I have no money...damn my broke ass!!)**

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**Chapter 05 - Flirting With Danger**

I was frozen to the spot as Jacob openly growled and Edward raised an eyebrow. Dust was still filtering around from where Edward had skidded his Volvo into the driveway. I didn't need a psychic ability to know he must have sensed or heard Jacob nearby and flew to get here before I answered the door.

Alice, more composed now that her brother had arrived, stepped more onto the porch and turned toward Jacob. "You must be Bella's friend Jacob." Her tone had taken a harder edge to it, the soft lift she normally spoke with gone.

Jacob and Edward both turned to me now and I swallowed not meeting either of their eyes. Alice, ever civilized, kept her voice even, no matter that there was a show-down happening on my front porch. Turning to Edward she asked, "clothes?"

He handed out a bag without so much as taking his eyes off of Jacob and Alice retrieved it, glancing inside quickly. I thought I may have seen the siblings share a quick look and nod but I wasn't too sure.

"I'll go change," she said before going back in the door. I opened my mouth in an effort to stop her but no sound came out. How could she just leave me to handle this? She either thought Edward would be civilized or was clearly ignorant to my stress-handling abilities. Swallowing, I turned back to the two apposing men on the porch.

"Bella," Edward said after a long pause. "I didn't know Jacob was coming by today." I knew edward was slightly annoyed with jacob before he left, having seen in his mind how the younger boy felt about me, but I was extremely surprised by the hardness in his voice now.

"I didn't know she needed permission to see her friends," Jacob sneered, his voice no where near as civilized as Edwards' had been.

I opened my mouth to say something, anything really, but Edward beat me to it, telling Jacob cooly, "when it's dangerous for her."

"Oh, isn't that just hilarious." Jacob laughed then, though it was dark and menacing, in no way reminding me of my light and sweet friend. "I doubt I'm the dangerous one. I know _what _you are."

Edward's eyebrow shot up once more before he tossed back, "as I do you."

My eyes widened considerably at that information but I remained still, not sure how to handle the present situation. On one hand, Jacob was my friend and I cared deeply for him, but I told him last night I wasn't able to give him what he wanted, not fully. But on the other hand I had really thought I wouldn't see at least for quite a while and by then I would have come to a conclusion on how to handle his reappearance. What he was doing showing up at my house was beyond me.

But I did know that I had to swallow my emotions and find out quickly before things got out of control. The feelings rolling off both guys were not happy-go-lucky, by any means.

"Jacob," I finally forced past my lips, trying to keep my voice calm, but just saying his name made me feel like I was right back in my kitchen last night. I could feel Edward's gaze focus on me briefly before returning to their original target. "What are you doing here?"

He too just glanced at me quickly before answering, "I need to talk to you."

I didn't need to ask about what. Jacob must have been thinking about it also cause Edward suddenly growled, his eyes pinning Jacob with a nasty glare. Jacob seemed to literally flare up some as he eyed Edward right back, the two men standing face to face.

"Bella, you're being rude. You should invite your friend inside," Edward said suddenly, his voice gravelly, barely a step above a growl itself. I hadn't seen him this mad in a long time and I wondered if it would come to blows. I couldn't stop my mind before I pictured Edward and Jacob attacking each other. The scene in my head went dark right as one of them collapsed, not letting me see who lived or who died.

"No!" I exclaimed suddenly, my voice shaking. _They can't fight, they can't fight_, I screamed over and over in my head, trying to think of anything to stop it from happening, even if I had to toss myself in the middle of it.

Edward though, for all his malice a second ago, looked at me with softer eyes before telling me, "I just want to get a few things straight." As soon as his eyes left me the rough glare returned.

"I don't associate with _leeches_," Jacob spit out and I couldn't stop the gasp from escaping my lips when Edward clenched his fists. It would be like nothing for him to suddenly reach out and connect with Jacob's body, more than likely throwing him past the cars and into the woods.

Jacob turned to me now and paused, seeming to soften at my face and ask, "Bella?" His eyes drew me in and I stared back, my mind throwing me a billion reasons to look away but all it took was the deep sadness rooted into them to keep me lingering.

"Make it fast _dog_," Edward growled, evidently not liking what he was hearing in Jacob's mind.

"Get out of my head," Jacob boomed suddenly, his eyes roaming and letting me go, taking a step toward Edward.

I didn't need to see Edward take a step forward to meet him before I threw myself out the door, yelling at Jacob. My foot had barely hit the porch before I was pulled sideways, Edward's strong and lean arms grabbing me up fast and putting me swiftly behind him, taking a protective stance in front of me.

"Let her go," Jacob threatened, his hands shaking.

Edward didn't say a word but I did, wrapping my arms around his waist since I wasn't able to get around him. "Don't do this," I begged, placing my head against his back. "_Don't _fight."

Suddenly Alice was there, fresh clothes on and saying in a loud voice, "the neighbors are going to wonder what's going on here soon. Do I suggest we leave this alone for now?"

Jacob sneered and stepped back from her disgustingly. I bent down under Edward's arm and pleaded with him with my eyes to back off. He caught my look for a few beats before rolling his eyes, trying to blow me off. But it didn't work : I saw the heart-ache and sadness before he glanced away, the presence of it on his face making my heart sank.

"Whatever," he muttered before turning back to Edward. "It's alone...for now."

Edward didn't miss his threat - nor did I. But without a word Edward reached back and found my waist, lashing his arm around it and steering me toward the front door. I could hear Jacob lopping down the steps and by the time I turned to look he was gone.

Alice was smiling crookedly at me when I reached the door. "Wow Bella, from vampire's to werewolf - you sure know how to pick 'em, don't you?"

Edward sent her a glare and a very hostile growl but she just rolled her eyes. I felt the need to explain, even if to just make myself feel better and I offered softly, "it's not like that with Jacob." Even though I wasn't too sure if it _hadn't _been like that with him before last night.

I wasn't sure, but I thought I heard Edward mutter, "maybe on your side," but when I looked up at him he didn't seem to have moved.

Alice seemed oblivious to Edward and asked, "is he why your house reeks?" I opened my eyes in shock and she just shrugged. "He smells...bad."

I couldn't stop from smelling around me, but I didn't smell anything except some little remnants of sea water on myself. I saw Edward look away and I froze, realizing that if he left a smell from just being in my house that I had to reek of him last night...last night when Edward found me wallowing on the kitchen floor.

"I think I'm gonna go take a bath," I muttered after a pause, escaping up the stairs before him or Alice could stop me. I quickly grabbed my bath supplies and the closest clothes I saw and went into the bathroom. I had stripped down to my underwear before I stopped and stood there, slowly looking over my shoulder into the mirror.

It was confusing and slightly upsetting but a small part of myself hesitated to take that shower, hesitated in wanting to wash Jacob's smell off of me. He had no claim over me, none what so ever, but I didn't want to wash him off of my body, _my life_, just because I had chosen Edward.

I loved Edward will all my heart, body, and soul but I still held a special place in there for Jacob also. He had been my best friend all this time - we bonded in so many ways and I felt the need to protect that bond from the outside world, even if that world included my soul-mate. I had no idea if we would ever be able to continue our relationship but I knew I would fight to at least hold on to the memories I had of him.

The rational part of my brain reasoned with the other side, convincing me to finally climb into the shower and turn the water on. It squirted out roughly, the hot water scolding my sensitive skin, making me back up and hiss before steadying my resolve and stepping back under it. I gave up all pretenses and let a few tears cry for Jacob again, placing my face under the spray and washing away any traces after a few minutes.

It didn't take long until I grew frustrated with my self and grabbed a sponge, dumping almost a whole body of bath-gel onto it before scrubbing myself from head to toe, fiercely digging in until I knew I was good and clean, smelling like just Bella Swan and no one else. I had just tossed my sponge back into it's spot when my foot caught a patch of gel that had missed my loofa and I slipped, grabbing onto the rim of the tub, trying to keep myself from falling all the way down. I still remained on my feet, just barely, but I hadn't stopped my back from catching the bath fixture I could feel the stinging heat on my back.

Soap suddenly slid down my back and hissed, realizing I must have broken the skin and, moving as quickly as possible, put my back under the water to clean the soap away. The hard pressure from the shower head started to numb the spot eventually and I took in a deep breath, nearly laughing from the ridiculousness of it all.

_Bad luck is my only luck_.

I had just stepped out from under the shower stream, looking down and seeing the pink tint of the water pooled at my feet from the blood dripping down my back when a sudden knock came from the bathroom door.

"Bella?" Edward called through. "Are you ok?"

"Uh, yeah, it's ok," I called finally, wondering how he knew I had been hurt. "I just fell, is all."

There was a long stretch of silence from the other side of the door and then I could hear him sigh and admit, "I think it's pretty deep...I can smell the blood."

I froze and stood there for a few beats before nodding, not that he could see me or anything. I came to finally and turned the water off, slowly climbing out of the tub, wincing slightly when I picked up my towel and wrapped it around myself, the fabric catching my cut.

"Can I-" I heard him pause on the other side of the door before adding, "are you decent?"

At the moment I was indeed _not _decent, wearing just a towel. Moving as quickly as possible I called out, "just a second," and started to pull on clothing. I winced more than once when putting on my shirt, but I finished and finally pulled open the door, releasing all the steam out into the hallway.

Edward was standing there waiting as I walked out, looking me up and down for the spot. I saw him linger on my back before I offered, "it's ok, I'm sure. Just a scrap."

He rolled his eyes and told me, "with your luck?" Before I could argue he breezed past me and started to rummage under my sink. When he caught me staring at him he added, "I know your father keeps a steady supply of first aid items with you living here."

He fished out the large band-aids, peroxide and other items before standing back up. "Shall we?" he asked, gesturing to my bedroom.

I stayed where I was though, my mind trying to comprehend. "But, Edward, I'm bleeding," I stressed. "You don't-"

"It's fine," he insisted, guiding me into the room as I still gawked at him. I wasn't watching where I was walking and before I realized it my foot caught something on the floor and I tilted forward, my face stopping just a foot away from the broken desk on the bedroom floor. I looked down and saw Edward's hands around my waist and let my breath out with a gush. He easily sat me back up on my feet and I hissed, feeling something rub up against my back.

"Come on, lets get you patched up," Edward told me a smile, leaning down to kiss my forehead. "Or we could wait another 5 minutes and let the hospital staff handle it all," he joked.

I shot him a look over my shoulder and hobbled to the bed, my foot throbbing from where I had caught the desk.

I looked over and saw Edward run his hand through his bronze hair before saying, "I'll take care of that, promise. I'll have you a new desk and computer tonight.." I looked back over my shoulder and eyed him before he rolled his own eyes and added, "nothing too flashy."

"The computer might be salvageable," I mused from my spot on the bed finally.

Edward just crinkled his nose and offered happily, "no, it looks trashed."

It was my turn to roll eyes this time and Edward just walked over, sitting beside me, organizing all the stuff he had brought with him from the bathroom.

"Are you sure you can...ya know? Without getting too tempted?" I questioned. "Cause I can do it myself-"

Edward just looked at me and stated plainly, "you can't reach it." I opened my mouth to protest again but gave up, knowing it was useless. My tension must have showed though cause I felt his hand in my damp hair, lightly caressing my neck and shoulder before saying, "Bella, you can trust me - I'll be fine."

"I know," I said without hesitation. "It's not that-" I cut myself off and just said instead, "peroxide burns," trying to cover up my nervousness.

"I would have thought you'd be used to it by now."

"Ha ha," I mocked softly, wiping my hands on my knees.

I could feel Edward move closer up behind me and then reach for the bottom of my shirt before pausing. If I wasn't mistaken I thought Edward was finally realizing my hesitations. We had never gotten to the point where either of our hands had ventured under clothing, let alone on top of clothing, due to Edward's old-fashioned upbringing and the fact that I was human and very tempting to the teenaged vampire's senses.

"May I?" he asked finally, his voice soft and right behind my ear. I just nodded and looked forward, knowing when my shirt was moving as the cold air met my skin. I could feel the fabric resting on my shoulders right before a cold finger touched my skin, sending a shiver down my spine.

"Did I hurt you?" Edward asked, his voice guilty as he pulled away.

"No," I answered automatically, bracing myself for when his fingers would return. His touch was tender as I felt them trace along side of the cut, examining it for some time.

"It looks better than I would have thought," he said finally. "You shouldn't need stitches."

"That's good," I added after a beat, slightly surprised because his hands were already back on my skin. I could feel their coldness at the touch but the trail they left was searing and hot, as if I was yet to feel the pain from being burnt.

"Ready?" Edward asked. I turned my head slightly, wondering what he felt the need to warn me about since his hands were already in contact, when I felt the cold liquid plash on my skin right above the wound.

I hissed automatically as the peroxide hit my cut and tensed, not thinking my back could get any more rigid until I felt his hands grasp my hips, gently and securely, and his body lean closer to mine. I opened my mouth and held my own breath as I felt _his _reach my skin, the sensation making my hands clench my knee's to keep from saying anything. His icy breath traveled the length of my back, blowing on the wound in an attempt to still the pain but all my body could decipher was his lips, so very close to sensitive skin, his hands resting on my hips in such a way to make my stomach drop and my heart nearly ready to burst.

I didn't dare close my mouth until he pulled back and moved his hands, going about unwrapping my bandages and starting to secure them. I fought every shiver trying to escape down my back from his touch and clenched my jaw eventually, refusing to let anything - a sigh, a gasp, his name - past my lips. His moved effortlessly down my back, placing the band-aids on quickly.

_Thank god_, I thought finally, feeling the last gauze be placed on. It was bad enough he had to see me loose it every time he kissed me; I was not about to let him see how much his hands affected me, since the feel and sight of my bare back seemed to do nothing to his superior control.

I started to shrug my shoulders, intending to let my shirt fall back down when I felt his touch once again. The back of his hand seemed to almost hover over my skin, only two of his knuckles actually coming into to contact with me but that was all it took. I dropped my head forward, my breath catching instantly and sealing my eyes shut, wanting to have full use of my other senses.

He was gentle and almost hesitant, tracing one of my shoulder blades before moving downward achingly slow. I felt him shift his body closer as his fingers continued to explore my tender skin, moving toward my side and grazing the skin below my arm, dangerously close to my front side. I fiercely grasped my comforter in an effort to suppress my emotions; I could feel my stomach drop and the flush crept up my face as I thought about just where his hand was.

His marble skin lingered for just a beat before he moved on and traced a pattern down the rest of my side, his hand ending on my hip, nestled as far down as he could go before my jeans stopped him. In the back of my fevered mind I wondered just where he his hand might have went if there were no fabrics to deny him and I shivered, the ache in the pit of my stomach intensifying. I felt the powerful grip as his hand dug into my hip, not enough to hurt but more than enough to take my breath away.

The first caress of his lips on my back nearly caused me to black-out, my head getting faint as I lost myself in his cool kisses. His lips were tender and seductive as he traced the same path his hand had before turning in the opposite direction, moving up my neck as his free hand held my hair up out of the way. My breathing came out ragged and unsteady as I forced myself to breath. His sweet breath tickled the base of my hair before he continued on his journey, moving down the other side of my back for a few moments before coming back up, burring his nose in the crook of my neck, inhaling deeply.

I could feel his hand moving from my hip and slowly around my waist, coming to rest palm down on my bare stomach, the coldness radiating off of it quickly being overtaken by my burning skin. It didn't take long for his lips to restart their inquisition and he quickly returned to nearly devouring my skin, his ache to taste all of my skin almost feverish now and finally sending me off the small edge I had been tittering on.

His name burst from my lips, the sound of my voice sounding foreign in my ears and I could feel the growl vibrate in his chest, possessive and heavy. My body reacted instantly with want and need and I squirmed to turn in his embrace, no longer content to be explored - I wanted to be doing the searching.

And then suddenly he was gone, my eyes flying open as I nearly fell off the bed without his arms to keep me steady. I quickly found him against the farthest wall, his hands pressed against the drywall and his head hanging low. I could see the veins in his tightly drawn arms and how taunt his back was, my eyes lingering on his perfect body. With his hands and lips no longer on me my shyness came back into factor and I nearly fell over, wanting to burry my head under the pillows nearby.

"Edward-" My voice shook with love, embarrassment, relief, need - there were too many conflicting emotions flowing through my body to be sure what I intended to say.

"Don't...speak," he growled loudly, his face hidden as he kept his back toward me.

I fought against my embarrassment, slowing my heart rate down and taking in deep breaths, trying to control my shaking body till I was able to move. My knee's were still shaky and I felt as though my legs were going to fall right out from under me but I stood anyway after a minute, slowly making my way across the room. I could hear his breathing become more erratic the closer I got, his back tensing even more through the thin fabric of his shirt.

"Bella..." His voice begged out as my fingers touched his back. I heard a crumbling sound and looked up, seeing his palms just barely start to push through my walls. I almost hesitated, not wanting to push his control anymore in one day.

But instead of backing up I placed my other hand on his back, slowly moving closer and letting them wrap around his body, coming to rest on his chest. I gently placed my cheek against him, waiting patiently and quietly as his breathing slowly started to become more regular, his muscles starting to loosen and finally relax under my touch.

"I could have hurt you."

I heard the anguish in his deep velvety voice and my eyes flew open. "You would never," I told him with conviction, my hands tightening around him instinctively.

When he spoke again his voice still held the same guilt but now it was also harder, the underlining anger coming through clear. "Bella...I lost control. And that is _too _dangerous for us. I shouldn't have taken advantage of the situation like I did. I'm deeply sorry..."

I picked my head up at that. "Hey, look at me." When he made no attempt to oblige I pulled on his shirt, hearing his sigh before he relunctingly faced my direction. I quickly looked up and captured his gaze, looking deep into his troubled eyes.

"You, Edward Cullen, have nothing to apologize for." After I was sure I had stressed my point, I added with a rueful smile, "and besides, it wasn't like I was trying to fight you off or anything."

"As if you could."

"As if I _would_."

He closed his eyes and breathed in deeply, his hands balling into a fist for a second before he released them. When his eyes finally reopened they were smoldering as he muttered darkly, "you insist to flirt with very dangerous monsters, silly girl."

I tipped my head and leaned closer in, reaching up and gently rubbing the back of his neck. "I believe you're more cuddly than dangerous, any day."

"Only you would," he told me sarcastically but I saw the smirk tugging at his lips, hinting that his anger was more or less gone now.

I grinned and added, "and just about any other girl whose comes in contact with those dazzling eyes of yours."

This time he smiled back openly and leaned down, wrapping his arms around my waist. "You have nothing to worry about then, for I'm saving all that for you."

"You better be," I threatened, stretching up onto my tiptoes to press my lips against his mouth, keeping the kiss slow and sweet. By the time I pulled back my heart was thundering again and I took in a deep breath.

Not soon afterwards I felt his tense in my arms. "What?" I asked, still trying to calm my heartbeat down.

I felt his hands come up and push my hair back off of my face as he sighed. "Your dad is on his way," Edward said, his words making my heart jump back up into my throat.

I opened my mouth to protest but stopped, just letting my forehead fall forward to rest against his chest. "How long do we have?"

Edward didn't answer for a few beats and I looked back up, watching as he appeared to be listening to something I couldn't hear. Suddenly he grabbed my hand and headed for my bedroom door. "I don't think your father would appreciate me in your bedroom," he said, leading the way down the steps. It took me a moment to place the change in his voice, but I soon realized he was nervous; quite nervous actually.

"Wait, where's Alice?" I asked quickly, trying not to trip as we raced downstairs.

Edward paused at the bottom of the steps and listened for a second before telling me, "she's gone." He seemed to be trying to make his mind up, looking between the steps and the front door.

"Edward..." I let my question hang in the air, waiting for him to answer.

He sighed deeply and told me bitterly, "he knows I'm back."

I couldn't help but little a little gasp slip out and quickly demanded, "how? Did he see you last night or-"

Edward's hard voice cut me off. "Your _wolf_...he just couldn't wait."

The anger and hostility in his tone made a ball of tread swell up in my stomach, clenching my gut. I clearly heard the gravel in my driveway crunch under the weight of a car pulling in.

"How bad?" The urgency in my voice made Edward stare down at me he answered, "bad enough." I nodded and took in a shaky, deep breath. I heard the slam of a car door and I closed my eyes, swallowing down a lump in my throat before turning back toward him.

"Maybe you should go and let me handle this by myself," I whispered quickly, panic starting to set in. I saw him hesitate and I added, "please...I need to do this."

He stared into my eyes for what felt like years before leaning in, pressing his lips against mine fast and hard. "I'll be nearby," Edward vowed.

Then he was gone and I was all alone, my heart ramming in my ears as the front door opened.

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**Ok, so there it was. I feel slightly relieved now that I've posted it...but then I just thought of your reviews and the butterflies are back!! But I'm a big girl, so don't hold back - let me know what you think! I promise I won't end up in the corner crying:)**

**Melissa**


	6. Revillusion

1**A/N : Hi guys :) I know this chapter is kinda short, but I wanted to get Bella and Charlie's blow-up out of the way. **

**As always, I wanna thank all my faithful reviewers - you know who you are! **_**flamingo 1325 **_**gets special thanks cause I always look forward to your reviews - they are the highlight of my posts!!!**

**BTW, the song at the end of this chapter is by 'Tantric' :)**

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**Chapter 06 - Revillusion**

I tried to force a look of non-chalance on my face as I heard the foot steps come down the hallway toward the kitchen and living room.

"Bella?"

There was a tone in his voice I had heard only a hand-full of times before and I tried to look positive yet assertive - most of those times had been recently, whenever Edward had been brought since he had left.

"In here dad," I called back after a beat.

He walked into the living and glanced around, clearly looking for someone other than myself, since I was standing in plain sight. The privacy seemed to calm the hardened look on his face and turned back to myself, saying, "we need to have a talk."

"I agree." The underlining tone of my voice caught Charlie's attention and he crossed his arms but remained silent. I took in that relief for a moment then chickened-out some, asking, "how was your fishing trip?"

Charlie's eyes squinted slightly but he replied politely, "decent - Billy caught a truck-load."

I nodded absent-mindly, "that's nice."

"Bella..."

I swallowed and then took in a deep breath, knowing it was now or never. "Cha-Dad..." I looked up into his eyes and started again. "I'm gonna assume you know what this about."

Charlie nodded, keeping quiet for the time being.

"Ok, well, I think you should know that I and Edward have worked through what happened. I care for him still and-" I had started strong, clearly over-confident due to his quiet demeanor when I suddenly shrank back, shocked by his outburst.

"No, I'm not allowing this!"

I stared, watching as he seemed to suddenly explode, his voice hard and waving his hands.

"I had hoped Jacob was wrong in assuming you two had gotten back together," he continued. "I had really thought you would know better Bella - you would say he was back but you two _weren't _together. I'm disappointed in you!"

"What?" I questioned softly, feeling the tickle in my nose at the word disappointed.

But Charlie was amped up and didn't see the hurt in my eyes. "What were you were ever thinking - taking that punk back is beyond me!"

The tears were now catching in my eyes, brought on quickly by anger and hurt. "Dad, give me a chance to explain."

"No way, not going to happen!" he thunder. He pointed a finger at me and added, "he is not allowed in this house ever again, do you hear me young lady?!"

I reared up at that, taking offense. "So that's it? I don't get a say?!"

"You got that right! That little punk better stay away from you!"

"He isn't a punk dad!" I screamed right back, matching his loud boom. "Edward is-"

"Off limits, that's what he is!" he finished for me. Charlie's face had turned deep red, his cheeks looking almost one fire. I was instantly hit with a thought of Harry Clearwater and my anger subsided.

"Dad," I tried, lowering my tone and seeking a different path to get his permission. "You can't just expect me to give up on him like this."

"But Bella, isn't that exactly what he did to you?"

The words cut me deep and I stilled, biting my lower lip as a few more unwanted tears slid down my cheek. I quickly reached up and brushed them away, looking down. "You don't know what you're talking about dad," I murmured, my voice barely audible.

"I know how you reacted to his leaving - I saw how it hurt you when he didn't even try to get in contact with you. And I heard from Jacob just exactly how deep those scars ran."

"Jacob doesn't know what he's talking about either," I protested softly, not being able to put more force behind the lie. Of course he knew, almost as much as she did, just how much Edward's dissappearance shook me.

"Then who does?" Charlie demanded. "You? _Him_? Cause I'd take Jacob's side over this any day."

"Jacob," I tossed out, getting louder with my emotions, "isn't exactly 'neutral' to this subject matter, dad."

"Even more better. He cares for you enough to know you need to be protected from people who are going to do nothing but hurt you!"

"Be protected?! Cause it sounds more to me like all you and Jacob have been doing is deciding my life for me!"

"Maybe it's a life you should choose!" Charlie insisted. "Jacob seems to really care about you, Bella."

Before I could stop and edit my words; before I could even think about what I was saying I yelled out, my voice raw with hurt, "I love Edward!"

Charlie froze instantly, all the fight being wound tight and coiled. "You're too young," he stated, a stone voice hinting to just how mad I had made him.

"It's the truth dad," I pushed past my heavy lips. "And he loves me too."

"You don't know anything about love, Isabella."

"Why?" I question as more tears shed out of my blurry eyes. "Because you don't want me to?"

"Are you sleeping with him?" Charlie demanded suddenly, his voice rising again.

Wide-eyed and shocked, I stared up at him. "What?! Dad-"

"I swear to god Bella, if he laid a hand on you he-he's..." he trailed off, too mad to even threatened Edward.

I groaned then, feeling like pulling my hair out. I didn't want to have this conversation with my dad period, much less right now, when Edward was probably within hearing range. _Not like anything else we said would offend him_, I thought sarcastically.

"I'm not having sex with Edward, dad? Ok!" I will admit I had yelled this so my sincerity level was low but when my dad just scoffed I felt a blow to the chest.

"Like you would tell me the truth right now," he muttered.

"Great, that's great Dad," I flung out, crying harder now. "Fine, don't believe me. But hear this : you can't keep us apart."

I guess Charlie had pretty much gotten used to me not talking back cause his eyes nearly burst from his head before he sucked in a deep breath of air. "You wanna bet? My house, my rules!"

"Then maybe I won't live in your house anymore!" It was a knee-jerk reaction to his words; I didn't even think before screaming them. But suddenly they were out there, hanging between us like a break-able piece of glass, twitching from my outburst.

Charlie seemed to calm down some after that, sealing his lips and looking slightly away, like he was intently reading something over my shoulder. "Fine," he told me after a long beat of silence. "I'll call your mother."

"No..." I whispered, the thought of leaving Edward instantly making it feel like a fist had grabbed up my heart, squeezing it.

Charlie looked at my horrorified expression before adding, his voice gruff, "it's probably better this way..."

I knew what he meant; It would better cause then he _would _be keeping me from Edward. I shook my head, the pressure on my heart getting tighter and tighter as the seconds past. "No..."

"You can leave this weekend," he speculated. "Give your mom some time to get things ready."

I could see the gears moving inside his head and took in a deep breath, feeling the hand in my chest finally give one last squeeze as my heart desenigrated.

"No!" I forcefully cried out, eyeing my dad angrily. "I'm _not _leaving Forks!" The glass that seemed to be hanging between us suddenly burst, our eyes meeting over the imagined shards of glass.

"Bella, you're going. I'm still in charge here and-"

"No, dad, no!" I stormed past him, racing for the stairs, taking them two at a time. I threw my door opened and charged in the room, heading for my closet. The small over-night bag I kept was hanging in there and I grabbed it, throwing the first things I saw into it.

"Bella, this is-" Charlie was behind me, his voice stopping. "What happened to your desk?" he asked.

I ignored him and stooped down, pulling my savings out from under my bed. I shoved the little bit of money I had into my pockets and turned, running past him with no warning and back down the steps. My ankle slipped on the last step and I faltered slightly, grabbing the banister to keep myself upright.

"Stop this right now!" Charlie told me, his boots thumping behind me as he tried to keep up.

I bit my lip and kept going, ignoring the pain in my ankle. "I'm 18 Charlie - you can't stop me!" My eyes blurred even more as I got closer to the door.

"Don't do this Bella."

The hurt tone in his voice made me pause with my hand on the door. I stood there, staring at the wood, trying to control the flow of tears so I could make out the patterns in the grain. "I'm not staying here without him, Dad."

When he didn't answer, didn't give his permission for me to still see Edward I finally tossed over my shoulder, "I'll be back for my stuff."

And walked out the door.

**-**

_Watch the time Passing by _

_Seeing strangers in the sky _

_Rusty eyes Stare and bleed _

_Hope the hell that you do not see _

_Something in this world needs to change _

_Yeah _

_Hear the lies See their eyes _

_Morally how we compromise _

_Stained again By a friend _

_Cut yourself back down to size _

_Something this world needs to change _

_Another slap in the face _

_I know this time of the year Is a Revillusion _

_Still I fall out of place _

_Open your mind to the change _

_Of evolution _

_Look around There's a change _

_Try to find The end of pain _

_People who cause are just partly to blame _

_Try to find the reason why we all stay the same _

_Something in this world needs a change _

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**Again, that was 'Revillusion' by Tantric!**


	7. Comforts Of Home

1**A/N : Sorry for the long lapse in posting lately. I had totally fallen into a dark pit of writers block with this story and needed to give my brain some downtime. I actual ended up writing some short fanfics (mostly 'Twilight') and posting them - so go check them out:)**

**Also, I have to express my deep appreciation for **_**flamingo 1325 **_**for helping me over the hurdles with this story. I don't know what I would have done without their help! **

**So, without further ado, read and enjoy!**

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**Chapter 07 - Comforts Of Home**

I don't even know when I grabbed the keys for my truck but they were in my hand as I opened the door to it, tossing my bag into the bed. I climbed up behind the wheel and instantly started it, the overly-loud rumble causing me to jump slightly, my tears now being accompanied with mournful cries. I'm not even sure how I managed to back out of the driveway without hitting Charlie's police cruiser or the trash-cans placed along the curb.

I could see my dad standing in the doorway on the porch, his face unreadable through my tears and I pulled away, making it hardly around the curve before I stepped on the brake and threw the gear-shift into park.

He was there instantly, the drivers side door seeming to be opened while the truck was still moving. I barely had time to get my hand off the wheel and I was in his arms, burring my face into his neck. He let me cry silently, rubbing my back and cradling me in his arms. I felt his fingers through my hair and his lips on my brow and the crown of my head from time to time, especially whenever I let a slightly louder sob out.

It wasn't until I had glanced up from his shoulder some time later that I saw he had been driving with me curled up on his lap, the position not offering any difficulty to his driving.

"Where are we going?" I asked softly, seeing the town buildings start to thin out into slightly more wooden surroundings.

"My house," Edward replied without hesitation, the tone in his voice making it sound like he thought I was crazy for having to ask him.

I pulled back more, feeling guilty and embarrassed all at once. "Edward, I-I didn't say all those things or do this so you would feel obligated to take me home with you." My voice was desperate as I tried to plead my case. I hadn't really thought about it at first, what I was doing, but after he let me cry I had worked it out in my head, figuring I could use what little cash I did have to rent a room somewhere and take on more hours at work to pay for it.

His eyes were hard around the edge when he looked away from the road and met my face, his voice determined. "I don't do anything because I'm obligated when it comes to you Bella; I do them because I want to."

I gave a slight sigh and tried again. "I can get my own place - maybe rent a room somewhere."

I didn't have to look away from his face to feel the truck pull over to the side of the road and stop, the engine shifting into park. His eyes were unreadable as he watched me for a long moment.

"Do you not want to stay with me?" he asked finally.

I instantly softened, telling him earnestly, "no, of course I do." And I did. The thought of sharing a bed with Edward every night again, waking up in his arms every morning and not having to hide it sent a shiver of excitement down my spine; not having to bid my time alone, waiting to be able to see him or even just knowing that at the end of the day he would always be there with me made my insides churn in the good way.

"Then it's settled," he said, leaning up and placing a kiss on my forehead. He sounded so final and trusting, making me almost feel like the choice was only up to him.

Almost though, not entirely. "But your family..." I paused there though, looking at him. "Where are they?"

Edward just smiled then, telling me cryptically, "around."

I rolled my eyes as he pulled back out onto the road, not even having to look. I kept quite for a few more moments before I started to bite my lower lip, my eyes dancing around the cab nervously.

"What?" Edward drawled out, knowing me so well.

I opened my mouth twice before I finally said, "my dad...he's gonna go ballistic when he finds out where I am." I looked down then, not being able to look at Edward's face.

"He already thinks this is where you were heading, anyway. He's counting on the fact that Carlisle and Esme won't let you stay." He seemed calm enough when he said the words, almost like he was bored with the subject but I could see the slight clench in his jaw when I glanced back up. Then he felt my gaze he smiled at me, adding, "besides, I know this will blow over eventually. You two love each other very much."

"You really think so?" I questioned him, my voice low.

His grin widened even more before he told me, "the only thing you have to worry about is me not wanting to give you back."

I couldn't stop a smile from forming on my face then, which Edward rewarded with a sweet kiss to my lips.

"Hey, eyes on the road mister," I instructed, earning myself a eye roll.

"Like I can go fast enough in the hunk of junk to need to look."

I pretended to be offended and reached out, rubbing the dashboard. "It's ok baby, he didn't mean it."

We had turned off of the main road and were now driving down a gravel path lined with trees on both sides, so I didn't complain when he pulled me closer and sent me a slight frown. "I thought I was your baby," he said, those glorious eyes dazzling me.

"Forever," I answered, my voice breathless from the trance he always seemed to hold over me when he did that. My nose was right beside his as we pulled into the Cullen's garage, the roof shading us as he put the truck into park.

Like a charge went through the bed of the trick, I could feel his desire to kiss me intently, sending goose bumps down my arms. The kiss was sweet and heartfelt as Edward reached up and cupped my check, wiping away a stray tear that was still lingering there. I felt his forehead rest against mine and I slowly opened my eyes, content to simply gaze upon his serene profile - eyes closed gently, relaxed and happy smile; it was more than enough to enlist a heartfelt sigh from myself.

We climbed out of the truck together a few moments later, his hand wrapped around mine as he helped me onto my feet. I glanced around the large multi-car garage and paused, letting my hand slide from his as I walked over a few feet, trying to get a better look.

It took me less than a second to notice Carlisle's car in the garage when we pulled up, as was Edward's Volvo, which we had left at my house, but I had just figured Alice took it when she left earlier, after stashing Carlisle's car here first.

But what threw me for the loop was the little black sports-coup sitting neatly in the corner.

_That's Jasper's car_...

"Edward..." I trailed off and looked at him, taking in his smile and enjoyment.

With a hand reaching outward he said pleasantly, "come on, they're waiting for us."

I took his hand and allowed him to lead me around the house and up the front porch steps before I stopped, making him gaze down at me from a step up.

"I-" I stopped for a brief moment, wanting to get my words right, "I don't want to intrude or just drop in on them with no warning."

Edward just smiled and looked at the doorway where Alice was now leaning.

"The guest of honor has arrived," she stated joyfully. When I looked at Edward she took offense and asked with mock-anger, "did you really think this would get past me?"

My eyes widened a bit and I asked her after a pause, my voice strained, "how much did you see?"

She shrugged like it was no big deal. "Enough." Then, as if a thought occurred to her she asked me, her eyebrows raised, "just what _did _happen to your desk?"

I opened my mouth but stopped when I felt a hand on my lower back. Encouraging me once more up the stairs Edward explained, "Alice has _graciously _explained the situation to everyone else." I threw him a quick look and he added, "just the turnout." He eyed his sister intently. "Correct?"

"Of course." Alice then turned to me and gave a little happy-hop. "This is going to be so much fun," she declared, taking my hand and pulling me through the large open doors. She continued to go in the background, saying how we could stay up late and do each others hair and paint our toe-nails, but my eyes were entranced by the Cullen's home. There were no white sheets, no cobwebs, not even any dust; it was sparkling clean and looked exactly like it had months ago, with just a few new things thrown in perfectly; possibly new trinkets from their latest travels, I guessed.

I noticed Alice had finally trailed off and I glanced back at her. Something nagged at me and I finally questioned, "who's everyone else?"

Edward, knowing what I meant, smiled and came up, wrapping his arm around my shoulder. "Carlisle, Esme, and Jasper are around here somewhere."

"Rosalie and Emmett are away on their, what is it, 6th or 7th honeymoon," Alice added. "So we'll be one less for the slumber party, but it'll still work."

I looked back at her and I heard Edward threaten her softly, "Alice..."

Not at all looking worried, Alice just stuck her tongue out and claimed, "you can't hog her the whole time."

"I can certainly try," Edward responded, hugging me closer.

"Bella!" I heard happily exclaimed from the living room and I looked over to see Esme walking in, her arms wide in a welcoming hug. Leaving Edward, I greeted her back joyfully, reveling in her embrace. Of course I knew I missed all of them, not just Edward, but it truly hit me just then how much I had missed Esme.

After I pulled back she offered, "I hear you need a place to stay."

Feeling embarrassed and ashamed for intruding, I quickly stammered, "I, uh, I can go somewhere else if it's a problem or-"

"Bella would love to stay," Edward said instead, cutting me off. Esme tossed him a smile and, keeping her arm around me, she escorted me out of the living room and toward the stairs.

"Carlisle will be delighted to see you," Esme confided in me with a warm grin. "I think he's missed playing hero-doctor," she joked.

I couldn't help but roll my eyes and add, "I doubt that - I'm a walking accident waiting to happen." I could feel the blush start in my cheeks and I looked down, hoping to hide it.

But Esme just laughed as we headed up the stairs. I didn't need to look behind to know that Edward was right there with us. Unlike when Edward has brought me to the study, Esme didn't pause any and went ahead to open the door, ushering me inside.

"Bella," Carlisle greeted, standing up and coming around his desk. He smiled widely and said, "we would be delighted if you stayed as long as you need."

My face was blushing even more as Carlisle turned to Esme and Edward and asked, "would you mind giving me and Bella a moment?" Esme, nodding with a smile, reached out and gave my arm one last squeeze before leaving the room. Edward, for some reason, lowered his head and avoided my gaze but did what Carlisle requested. I couldn't help but stare at his retreating back feeling like I was missing something.

I couldn't help but let a little wave of panic swell up as I was left alone in the room with Edward's father. Not that I was worried about him biting me or anything - he would be the last Cullen I would need to worry about that about - but because I thought he was going to be mad or disappointed with me; and that thought was almost as staggering as the one I had when my own father felt that.

Carlisle, for his part, seemed calm and very serene. Going over to his desk, he leaned against it and settled his gaze back on me.

"I believe I owe you my gratitude."

I nearly lost my footing at this and I mutely followed Carlisle's hand as he offered me a chair. I sat down and before I could ask what he was talking about he began again.

"When we left I was very worried about Edward. He was not doing well."

I found myself imitating Edward's lowered head, my face twinging pink once more. Edward was not one for being embarrassed - quite the opposite actually - so I knew this conversation was not something he wanted to happen.

"He left us and I can't say I agreed to it but I knew he had to do what he needed to get back to how he was." Carlisle seemed to think for a moment before adding, "little did I know that what he needed to get back to normal was you."

I shifted in my seat and finally looked back up. I wasn't sure if he was waiting for me to say anything or just thinking, but I felt the need to express how I felt. "I need him too...I love him. More than he knows, I think."

Carlisle smiled and nodded. "He's only been in the house a few minutes but the difference in his mood, his personality..." He smiled even more and stood up from the desk he had been leaning on. "I clearly see now how happy you make him."

I smiled softly at his words, my blush reaching up to my ears. "He makes me very happy also." Before I could stop the word from tumbling out of my mouth I looked up, adding suddenly, "I'm sorry for all that happened."

Slightly confused, Carlisle paused. "You have nothing to apologize for Bella."

"No, I do," I insisted, standing up. I didn't step far from my chair for fear of my knees wobbling, but I needed to get this out into the open; I needed to make him understand. "I was the reason you had to leave your home and for that I will always be sorry. I nearly made Jasper loose everything he had worked for over the last few years, and I put your family in danger of being exposed." I swallowed deeply then, trying to find my voice once more.

"But most of all I'm sorry cause I don't regret any of it. Edward, your family...I'd be lost without them. And for that I apologize for - it wasn't my place to demand that of you." I found myself looking at the floor once more, feeling like I was barely a foot tall.

"That was very brave of you, admitting that."

_Yeah, brave_, I thought, holding back tears for the millionth time today. Bravely had nothing to do with it - it was selfishness, true and pure. I needed Edward in my life like a drug-user needed his addiction; he was my alcohol, my heroin, my air.

"And completely unnecessary."

I looked up at Carlisle's last words, my eyes wide. He seemed to stare into to space for some time before saying gently, "loneliness is a blessed thing. It can damn you to hell or much worse with a casual flick or whim before going into a different direction just a quickly. If you're strong you survive it's torrent, you hold the world's sorrow on your shoulders. If you are unable to brace those things you crumble."

With a sad smile, Carlisle looked at my face once more. "You nor I were the first, nor will be the last, to fall to our knees."

Carlisle had changed Edward out of loneliness I had once been told; he had been facing the world alone and needed someone to help him understand it all, to help him keep the sorrow from off of his shoulders.

"Do you regret your decisions?" My voice was low enough that I had barely understood what I had asked myself but I knew I had been heard.

"Some more than others," he mused after a pause. "When you actions affect another ones so strongly you can't help but start to wonder if they would have been better off without your interference. So yes, I have some regrets." Carlisle walked closer then, placing both of his hands on my shoulders. "But none that involve you, my dear."

I swallow down the lump in my throat and smile, telling him a shaky thank you. He smiles briefly before going back toward his desk.

"You can come in now."

I look over my shoulder and watch as Edward walks in, his eyes still downcast. I quickly turned back to Carlisle, almost about to ask if Edward heard us but stopped, knowing it didn't matter - he knew what the talk was going to be about before he even left the room.

"Well, I'm sure Bella would like to see the room she's staying in," Carlisle told Edward, who just nodded.

"Um, yeah, sure," I agreed, taking Edward's hand and following him out the door, down the hallway, and toward the next set of stairs. But before I could place my foot on the first step Edward had me in his arms and his lips were overtop mine.

I sighed into his mouth and leaned into the kiss, wrapping my fingers into his hair, needing to feel this release right now. It didn't take long for Edward to get control and pull back, taking in a deep breath with a saddened smile. I looked up into his eyes and I saw him staring down in mine intently.

"I know now how much," he whispered finally.

I instantly blushed and tipped my head down some before Edward grabbed my chin and make me look back up. "I've lived too long to not have my own set of regrets, but you will never be placed among those ranks - my whole salvation is you, Isabella Swan."

He let go of my chin and I leaned in, burring my head in the crook of his neck. I inhaled deeply, letting his indescribable scent envelope me, calming my nerves and frayed emotions. I took strength from his closeness, from his being and told him, "you keep me from crumbling."

"As you do I," he promised softly, his fingers running through my hair as I clung to him. "Do you want to see your room?"

I nodded and, after pulling back slightly, followed him closely up the steps, watching my feet so I didn't trip. Edward lead me down hallway and stopped at the last door. I paused and stole a glance at him, wondering if my layout of his house was as accurate as I thought.

Sending me a smile, he opened the door and ushered me in. At first glance I stopped, surprised. "This _is _your room..." I said in confusion.

"You don't want to stay in my room?" he asked.

"N-no, it's not that," I explained. "But where did you get the bed?"

Sitting in the middle of his room was now a very large, very frilly looking bed. It was pilled high with pillows and blankets in rich browns, maroons, and gold to match the decor of Edward's room.

"Alice acquired it as soon as she saw you were staying," he explained, walking me further into the room and shutting the door behind us. "And..." he added slyly, going over to his walk-in closet. "She also got you these, but don't blame me."

Curious, I walked over and stared at the hanging clothes placed in the very middle of the closet. I shook my head and backed out.

"No, Edward, no," I told him.

"Bella," he offered, knowing what I was going to say. "She meant well."

I sent him a look. "I know that. But..." I trailed off, feeling uncomfortable. Glancing back at the bed I offered, "Edward, you have a bed in a house where no one sleeps."

"You sleep," he pointed out, coming over and wrapping his arms around my waist. Walking me backwards toward the bed, he added, "and now you're staying so..." I sent him a slight eye roll as he settled us both down on the overstuffed bed. Instantly I could feel how comfortable it was and relaxed some, but I didn't back down.

"As much as I..._appreciate _the gesture, your sofa would have been more than fine Edward."

He seemed to nod but then thought better of it and told me, his face and body very close to mine, "even someone who doesn't sleep knows that beds do have their purposes, though."

The tone in his voice stopped me cold; my stomach had permanently launched itself into my throat and I knew my breathing had stopped for a few beats. When Edward leaned over and kissed me gently I easily swooned, throwing my whole soul into it. The kiss was long and sensual, setting my already beating heart into overtime. I couldn't stop myself from moving closer as the kiss went on, wrapping my arms around his neck and threading my hands through his hair.

Suddenly, hands like vice grips steadied on my waist and moved me back over to the bed. Edward's lips left mine and he shook his head, telling me in a tight voice, "you continue to tempt more than you should, love."

Smiling widely, I leaned back closer to him again. "How many times do I have to tell you you're not dangerous Edward Cullen," I stated calmly.

Edward just growled softly, earning a raised eyebrow from me. "You don't have any self preservation, do you?" he demanded. If it hadn't been for the slight tremor under his hard voice I might have thought he was mad at me, which he probably was, but I knew the whole reason for the comments was cause I was tempting him further than his control could handle.

"When it comes to you? None," I answered his question, making another growl form in his chest. It was more than obvious that my answer didn't make him happy but I just smiled. Rolling his eyes, he got up from the bed and took my hand, helping me down from the extremely tall, puffy bed.

"Lets get you some lunch," he muttered, throwing an arm across the back of my neck. As if on cue, my stomach growled. I could see his smile peeking out and I jokingly punched him in the arm for laughing. He pretended to rub his sore arm.

"Ha ha," I mocked sarcastically, sticking my tongue out at him. I saw the playful glimmer in his eye and I didn't even have time to run before Edward scooped me up into his arms and over his shoulder.

"Edward!" I squealed with a giggle. "Put me down."

"No," he decided after a pause, carrying me out the door and down the hallway. I could tell he was headed for the stairs and I panicked. Esme and Carlisle were down stairs.

"Edward, no," I hissed, kicking my feet. I guess he sensed my stress and obliged, lowering me back down to the floor. My cheeks were flaming and he just laughed at my embarrassment, earning a glare from me. "It's not funny."

Throwing his arm back around my neck, he leaned down and kissed my cheek before heading for the steps once more.

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**I hope this helped with the ling wait you guys had! Maybe, if I get enough reviews I'll post the next chapter much quicker... :)**

**Melissa**


	8. Dinner Talk

**A/N : So, I wasn't planning on posting this chapter tonight (or really, this morning, seeing how it's 6:06 am, but I haven't been to bed yet, so...) But I figured the weekend was as a good a time as any.**

**I haven't worked on this story for some time now - I just happened to have some extra chapters already written - and I've been sinking further in my Gilmore Girls addiction...Jess is perfection...ahem, _anyway_, I promise to start devoting more time to this fic and start updating better :)**

**So, please enjoy!**

**Disclaimer : Not mine...**

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**Chapter 08 - Dinner talk**

Esme thought ahead to my 'food' issues and had already gotten take out from a very nice restaurant in Port Angeles. The smell literally made my mouth water and I skipped over to the table where Esme was unloading the food. It took me a minute to realize that Jasper had wondered in the room, curiosity getting the better of him.

"Hello Jasper," I said nicely with a smile. He nodded back and smiled briefly before turning and leaving the room.

Esme, who seemed to notice everything, leaned over and told me in a 'it's-no-big-deal' way, "he's just a little tense."

I let my fingers follow the pattern on the back of the chair in front of me nervously, my head bent down. "I didn't mean to cause trouble..."

Esme patted my hand instead and offered, "Jasper likes you very much." I couldn't help it when my eyes got wide and my head jerked up. Esme just laughed. "Don't be so surprised."

"I-I'm not," I stammered out, trying to not sound surprised, even though I was. "It's just that he doesn't really talk to me..."

"My son is a complicated being," Esme mused out loud, her hands lingering on the take-out boxes as she spoke. "His power is very emotional; empathy always is. But more times than naught his own feelings can cloud over other things."

Esme smiled again, but this time it was softer. "I'm sure you're well aware of Jasper's special...way of dealing with emotions." When I nodded she continued. "Did you ever stop to wonder how he knows when to use his powers?"

I shrugged and answered, "I just figured he could feel the tension or anger or..."

I trailed off and Esme picked up, adding, "guilt? He has been taming his own demons with that night for quite some time now."

"I don't blame him," I whispered, my eyes frozen to the fingers as they laid across the back of the chair I was standing behind. "I never did."

"You blame yourself. He blames himself. And he _feels _it all. It's a lot for him to take in," Esme explained. "But he will come around; give it time."

I nodded, making up my mind to make sure that happened; it was about time I came face to face with Edward's leaving - every aspect of it.

With a small laugh, Esme added in a light tone, "plus he feels how much you love Edward." The too-familiar feeling of a blush once more dawned on my cheeks and Esme laughed once more. "My, we are a shy one, aren't we?"

"You have no idea," Edward answered before I could, coming in and sitting down at the table across from where my food had been placed. Esme took the now-empty packages and left the room, leaving me and Edward alone.

"Eat up," he added. "I have plans for latter."

"Plans?" I asked with a smile, pulling out my fork and taking a bite. It used to bother me some when Edward was around when I ate; I always felt like he was staring at me, being disgusted. But now I was very comfortable with the situation and even sighed when the food hit my mouth.

"This is really good," I commented after swallowing, pointing to it with my fork. Edward just smiled without comment and I paused asking him something I had always wanted to. "I know you _can _eat food, but why don't you? Is it just because of the taste or more?"

Edward shrugged and answered, "there's no real desire to so and you get used to it, so eventually the idea is..."

"Yucky?" I filled in, earning a smile from him.

"Yeah, yucky." His voice was mocking but I just ignored it.

I took another bite and chewed it slowly. After swallowing, I took a sip of the water Esme had also provided. "Ok, I have another question." I was instantly transported back to junior year right then, my rendition of our game of '20 questions' causing a large smile to grace my lips.

Edward too smiled, understanding my little quote, before nodding and I asked, "considering that I _do _eat food, does it ever disgust you?"

Edward seemed to be hiding a smile when he told me, "no, Bella, you do not disgust me. Quite the opposite actually."

I rolled my eyes playfully before taking another bite.

Edward though, seemed to loose some of his smile and said suddenly, "is it my turn to ask a question of you?"

I nodded since my mouth was still full, though I was unsure of what he wanted to ask me.

His eyes were slightly downcast and hard to read when he went, "considering that I _don't _eat food, does it ever disgust you?"

My bite caught in my throat and I coughed, making Edward jump up to come over, though I was perfectly fine.

"Here, drink this," he said, handing me my water. I eagerly gulped down some water, coughing a few more times afterwards, causing a slight tear to glisten in my eye from the pressure.

"Are you ok?" Edward asked gently, rubbing my back.

I ignored his question though and looked deep into his eyes and said with emotion, "don't you _ever _think that."

"Lets be serious here, Bella"

"I _am."_

Edward just sighed and added, "I'm not human Bella."

I squared my shoulders and demanded harshly, "and do you feed on humans?"

"I have..." Edward whispered softly, not being able to meet my eyes.

The pain and regret in his voice seized my stomach and I reached out, making him look back up at me. "Stop," I ordered gently. "You are such a wonderful and caring person...you should never, _ever _think any differently."

I could tell our conversation was starting to upset him so I smiled and quickly changed the subject. "So, what are these plans you alluded to earlier?"

-

A half and hour later we were well on our way in the woods, Edward running with full abandonment with me on his back. I used to be terrified of this but now I loved the feel of the air through my hair, the way the world seemed to be spinning all around but I was perfectly safe. It didn't take long for us to reach near our destination and when Edward stopped to put me down I nearly froze in place, but recovered quickly.

Though, I guess it wasn't quickly enough for Edward cause he instantly came to attention and asked, "what's wrong?"

"Oh, nothing." I flashed him a smile and took his hand, intending on pulling him forward into the meadow, _our meadow_, and prove nothing was wrong. The idea of ruining this place for us was not something I wanted to come true so I was willing to put my fears aside. Coaxing him with a smile I lured him to the clearing, bracing myself for when we were to cross into it.

The meadow was still as beautiful as it had been before. The sun seemed to be brighter here, though the traces of the days rain was still lingering in the ankle-length grass. I expected to feel fear when I walked among the grass but that wasn't what settled in my stomach; Jacob's wolf face stared at me from deep within my mind instead.

"Bella, are you sure you're alright?"

I smiled up at Edward wanly, for once both glad and terrible-feeling that he couldn't read my mind. Of course I was glad cause I didn't want to hurt him by ruining our trip with Jacob but I felt terrible also because his aversion to my thoughts meant I didn't have to completely honest with him.

"I will be," I settled with telling him, knowing it was true, in some ways. He let me get away with the off-hand answer and pulled me close as we reached the center of the meadow, pulling me down onto his lap as he sat.

We sat together like that for some time, both enjoying the others closeness; him absent-mindly playing with my hair as I ran my fingers over his arms as they held me, tracing imaginary designs. But a nagging thought kept creeping back into my mind, not letting go as I tried to pry it away.

I finally gave in and asked, not looking at him, "Edward..."

"Hmm?" he murmured in reply, tracing a finger down my chin and across my neck.

I hesitated in asking my question, knowing it would ruin our light mood but I just couldn't let it go. The guilt and remorse had been plaguing me ever since it had happened.

"Um, just how much of my dad and mine's conversation did you hear?"

But to my shock he didn't seem to be upset by it; he just leaned in and placed his nose against the hollow of skin under my ear, inhaling gently before saying, "all of it - I said I would be near-by, did I not?"

"Well, yes, you did," I said. I fidgeted with my hands before adding, my voice full of guilt, "I just feel like I should have given you some kind of warning."

He gave a soft chuckle against my skin before answering. "Bella, love, I believe I got a fair enough warning myself when he pulled in."

"You know what I mean."

Edward seemed reluctant as he pulled away to look at me. "It wasn't a surprise. Charlie cares for you very much; of course he would want to protect his only daughter."

I couldn't help but eye him. "You're taking this awfully well."

He shrugged and tossed a smile my way. "The monster is usually hated when he steals away the young damsel."

I sent him an eye roll. "I'm serious."

"So am I, Bella." When I didn't seem to believe him he sighed and added, "I harbor no ill feelings toward your father; in fact, I'm quite awed by how much he loves you. He only wants what's best." But then he reached out and cupped my chin, making sure I was looking him in the eye when he told me, "but I _do _regret coming between you and him. It hurts you both."

I nodded and gave in, telling him with a slight smile, "but then you got me to take home."

"That I did. I may have to send him a thank-you card," Edward joked.

"Please don't," I quipped quickly.

He just grinned and leaned in, playing with my hair again. "You know, I was quite surprised by how perceptive you father is though," he mused a some time later.

"How do you mean?" I asked lazily, leaning back into his embrace again, now that I had voiced my worries.

I could hear the smirk in his voice as he answered, his breath tickling my neck, "he asked the perfect question about us, given what we had just been doing before he arrived."

I sat there a moment, confused by his comment. But then the answer hit me like a load of bricks and my face instantly flared up, remembering Edward's hands on my bare skin upstairs and then Charlie's embarrassing question a few minutes later. A few seconds later another load of bricks were dumped on my head as I thought back on that morning.

"Is that way you raced us downstairs? Because Charlie thought we had..."

Edward just continued to run his fingers through my hair and hold me close, but I could see his grin was still in place. "He's quite convinced we're being intimate. You should hear some of his enraged theory's on how we broke your desk."

"Oh my god!" I cried, mortified. I moaned with sickness and buried my face in my hands, too horrified to let anyone see my face, let alone Edward.

"It's very hilarious, honestly. He thinks I'm a bad influence."

I peeked an eye out from between two of my fingers and tossed out, "yeah, from your perspective. You don't have a father convinced their significant other is corrupting them!"

"Technically I don't have a father either," Edward offered.

I pulled my hands down and shot him a quick pout. "This is serious Edward! I can never talk to my father ever again - the humiliation is too huge!"

He scoffed and leaned back, bracing himself on his elbows as I continued to set up, perched on his lap. His expression seemed exhausted, like he was tired of our conversation. "It's natural for him to wonder how close we are - he's scared you're growing up too fast. In the end it would probably be better if everything was out in the open."

I shook my head, trying to make him grasp my horror. "Edward, not everyone lives in a house like yours where privacy isn't an issue. We don't all have parents who would be willing to move their teenage son's girlfriend in and allow her to sleep in the same room with him!"

"Esme and Carlisle are well aware that we don't take things too far."

"Exactly!" I stressed. "You guys knows things like that about each other. Me and my dad don't - I can't even _think _about having a sex talk with Charlie!" A shudder ran through me at that, the image too horrible.

Sitting up some, Edward told me finally, "it's all a moot point either way, isn't it? We aren't having sex."

"I know!" I nearly yelled. "It's not fair - if we were at least I'd feel a little validation for the accusations!"

Edward sat the rest of the way up then, his voice harder. "So let me see if I have this correct - you're not mad that your dad thinks we're being intimate, but instead upset that we aren't?"

"Yes!" Then I quickly re-thought when he had asked me and tried again. "No, I mean, yes, I'm upset that my dad thinks we're having sex."

"And you're opinion on us not having it is..."

Edward trailed off and I instantly clammed up, turning to look away and survey the woods surrounding us. I could feel his patient gaze on me though and I groaned, knowing he wasn't going to give up. I couldn't help but attribute this quality to time, seeing as how when we first meet he easily grew frustrated at not knowing what I was thinking.

"The truth?" I muttered finally.

"Of course." His voice held no room for debate.

I sighed deeply and looked down, staring at my hands. "Sometimes...I get upset with the situation. Especially when I seems like it effects me more than it does you." I didn't dare look at his face as I sat there, turning more red by the second.

I heard a dark, humor-less chuckle come from his direction and I finally peeked an eye over that way, surprised to find him laid down, his eyes closed and his hands up in his hair.

"You really think it doesn't effect me?" he questioned, his eyes now open but staring straight up at the sky. "Do you even realize how hard it was for me to not turn you around in my arms this morning and lay you down across your bed, burying myself in you forever?" His voice was thick and deep by the end and I swallowed, my mouth suddenly dry.

And then his eyes pierced me and my breathing stopped cold, getting caught in my throat. "Or even how hard it is right now with you just sitting on my lap?"

He slowly sat up, never taking his eyes off of mine and making my heart rate get more erratic the closer he got. His hand slowly reached out and caressed my neck, pulling me closer against him. I leaned in willing, mesmerized with the smoldering look in his eyes.

"The vampire in me may crave your blood but the man in me...he craves so _much _more," Edward promised, his usually velvet voice hard and gravely now. His hand left my neck and he traced a finger down my back, sending shivers down my spine. "So soft..." he murmured, leaning closer to place a kiss at the crook of my neck.

"So warm..." Edward moved his lips up higher on my neck next, kissing the area right below my chin. "And so willing..." he nearly growled, the sensation vibrating through my body. And then, like always, he pulled away and I found him laying down again.

But this time, like this morning, I noticed the bunched muscles, the tightly clinched jaw, and how his hands seem to be holding his hair, as if to keep them from moving away. I moved very slowly as I laid down flush against him, my body covering his as I placed my head on his chest, knowing deep down that he needed me closer no matter how difficult it was for him to remain in control.

He hands soon re-wove themselves in my hair, gently splaying it across his chest as we laid together, breathing deeply and contentedly. I closed my eyes shortly, peaceful and relaxed as I lazily basked in the little light there was. Sunlight soon turned into twilight and I felt Edward stir, shifting us both into a sitting position as his cell phone started to vibrate.

He looked down and eyed the caller i.d. before opening it, placing it to his ear. I looked up after a beat, wondering why he hadn't said a word when I saw his eyes harden over.

"It's time to leave," he stated suddenly, standing up in one fluent motion, pulling me also. I didn't get the chance to ask what was going on before Edward swung me on his back. I wrapped my arms and legs around his body out of reflex and remained quiet as he ran, getting us back to his vehicle quicker than it had taken for us to reach the meadow. He barely paused as he sat me on the ground and ushered me to the drivers side of the shiny Volvo.

"Edward," I questioned as he opened the door.

"Get in the car Bella," he instructed, not wasting any time as he followed suit. I was still pulling my legs over to the passenger side when he turned the key and swung the vehicle around.

"What's going on?" I demanded, my voice rising. "What aren't you telling me?"

"I don't know."

I stared at him incrediously for a moment, taking in his set jaw and clenched fists around the steering wheel. "What do you mean? You obviously had a reason for leaving the meadow," I pointed out. "So what is it?"

"I don't know," he repeated once more, rasing his voice. I straightened out the expression on my face, trying to cover up my hurt but he saw through it, sighing deeply and loosening his grip on the steering wheel.

"I didn't mean to frighten you," he said softly.

"Who was on the phone?" I asked instead, not acknowledging my freight.

Edward seemed to weigh his options in his head before admitting to me, "Alice."

I could feel my heart speed up at the name. I swallowed deeply and looked away from his face, setting my eyes on the speeding scenery we were passing by. "What did she see?"

"Nothing." I whipped my head back around and opened my mouth to argue that I wanted to know, that he couldn't keep these things away from me when he added, "your future disappeared."

I heard his voice catch slightly on the words and I numbly amended, "she saw me die..."

"_No_," he insisted, but I wasn't sure if it was directed to himself or me. His eyes were drawn when he looked at me. I felt his arm come around my shoulders and I leaned into him. I placed my cheek on his chest.

"What exactly did Alice say?" I asked him.

I could still hear the tightness in his jaw as he explained, "she just said your future disappeared - you were suddenly invisible to her."

Instantly this morning flashed in my head. I leaned back slowly, my eyes non-focused as I remembered Alice's inability to see Jacob on the porch. _I didn't see him coming_, she had stated; and even added a second later that my future left for a moment also.

"She didn't see me resurface...come out of the water..."

"Bella?" Edward questioned, his voice alarmed by my soft statement and the look on my face.

The past few days rushed past my mind quickly, unknown aspects falling into place like a puzzle in my head. The reason she had thought I was trying to commit suicide, why Alice never saw me be pulled from the water - the reason was right there, staring me in the eyes this morning on my porch.

"Jacob..." I breathed, my eyes clearing up as everything finally started to make sense.

**----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

**While I'm NOT a Jacob fan, he will be in this story much more. Before 'Eclipse' he had a small, soft spot in my heart (I liked him so much better pre-werewolf...) so all you Jacob lovers can stay but don't expect too much - I am pro 'Team Edward' :)**

**That being said, it is now time for the review lines to open - review often as possible and as much as possible! LoL**

**Hell, who am I kidding...once is more than enough for me...**

**Melissa**


	9. Revelations

**A/N : It's been dawning on me that I'm horrible at replying to my reviewers, and I feel awful about that you guys. Here you are, taking the time to review and tell me what you think and I'm completely ignoring you guys (I'm not really, I read and appreciate everything you say, but I feel that way) so I'm taking this time to say something to all who reviewed last chapter :)**

**Laughing Dragoness - **While a good battle would be nice, I have a pretty good idea where I'm going with this story and don't see any 'mythical-showdowns' outright...but who doesn't love a few good skirmishes? (and keep in mind that my idea's change and reshape all the time, so who knows...Edward and Jacob do like to push each others buttons...)

**YouKnowDebussy - **Go Team, Go:) 'Twilight' & 'New Moon' Jacob were fun and lighthearted...not all cocky and smug like 'Eclipse' Jacob...

**ChieriAn9el - **Sometimes I feel like I play too much with Edward's feelings and make him all 'grr' and kinda mean...but thanks for saying otherwise :) Also, Jacob can't help but do something stupid - he's too damn smug for his own good.

**Vampire4evernever - **I'm glad you enjoyed the last chapter! Though now we leave some of the sweetness behind and dive right into the angst, so be prepared! (but don't worry, more fluff and 'candy-heart-chocolatly-goodness-sweetness' coming up next chapter!) LoL

**lafrancesa - **I welcome all walk-ins and newbies - no appointment necessary! LoL :D I'm glad you found this fic and don't worry, you will get your Jasper fulfillment soon enough...

**Rebecca - **Your words made me blush! I'm ecstatic that you adore my writing so much! I don't know if I deserve to be in the same realm as Stephanie Meyers, but I deeply appreciate your wonderful review - it made my day! (hell, it made my week, year - LIFE) :D

**mrs Edward cullenxxx - **I'm glad you liked the last post!

**J.Farrell - **I totally understand what you're saying - This series wouldn't be the same without that hate-able, yet love-able, teenage werewolf. 

**SuprSmartChic - **While I'm loyal to my team, I don't hate Jacob outright...dislike, yes, but not hate. He does get a bad rap, and I'm noticing and a lot Edward fans are pretty strong about their hatred for Jake, but I can't take it that far - I can't help but remember that if it wasn't for him, Bella would have been in far worse shape when Edward finally did return.

**Amobutterfly25 - **Don't worry about my feelings - I can take some Jacob bashing ;) And I have also noticed that Jacob likes to just 'pop' up and ruin special moments between Bella and Edward, but don't worry - No Jacob sightings in this chapter!

**abbie - **:D LoL

**And now, here is the next chapter! Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer : Not mine! I'm too poor to buy 'em and too scared to steal them so I just have to keep on pretending like everyone else...**

**----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

**Chapter 09 - Revelations**

"What about him?" Edward demanded.

"Call Alice," I told him. When he just stared at me, I added, "call Alice and tell her to look for my future again."

Before he could pull the cell phone out of his pocket it suddenly buzzed. For once I was quicker than him and snatched it out of his shirt pocket. "Alice?" I asked, my voice rushed.

"How did you know?" she questioned across the line.

"This morning," was all I said; I knew she would understand.

"What is going on?" Edward demanded, obviously frustrated by my lack of information.

"Pull over, everything's fine," I told him while Alice simultaneously said in my ear, "I don't think it is, Bella."

"What do you mean?" I questioned her as Edward swung the car onto the side of the highway. I wasn't sure if Edward could hear her side of the conversation but he remained quite as she continued.

"If you're correct, which I believe you are, that means you were out in the middle of the woods with a newly-born werewolf."

Before I could argue Edward took the phone from my hands and placed it to his ear. "Explain, now," he told her, his voice severe. I, most definitely, could not hear the whole conversation and listened as he added back to his sister quickly, "I didn't hear anything big enough for that to be approaching."

A thought occurred to me and I blurted out, "if they had just then made the decision to come to the meadow, Alice would know before they even got close." When he looked at me, I added, "we wouldn't have had a reason to leave yet - we'd still be there if she hadn't called."

I waited as Alice told her brother something else, which he agreed to, before he shut the phone and replaced it into his pocket. He closed his eyes and laid his head back, resting it against the top of his seat. I watched as he pinched the bridge of his nose in a move that I had come to recognize he did when he was stressed.

"We were never in any danger," I said finally, my voice light with relief.

"What you and I see as dangerous is two very different things," Edward growled, his voice thick. "I was right to make us leave."

"What are you talking about?" I stared at his rigid posture and shook my head. "It was just Jacob or one of his friends."

"You seem to be forgetting the main part of this conversation," he accused me. When I just raised my eyebrows, he added, "werewolves are not stable creatures, they are dangerous."

"The pack has never hurt me." I thought back to Paul's first reaction to my knowledge of their existence and added, "Jacob would never allow it."

Edward laugh was bitter as he told me, "I'd be more worried about him than anyone else." I could see his sarcastic smirk in the glow of the dashboard's lights and I instantly got defensive, taking on the role of Jacob's protector quickly.

"What does that mean?"

"That child has no control over his anger or actions. He's-"

"That _child _is my best friend," I interrupted him, my voice rising to meet his angry tone.

"He's too dangerous for you to be around."

I stared at his profile in the neon light. "Excuse me?" 

"He's a risk I'm not willing to take," Edward added, his voice firm.

"You're not willing to take?" I repeated, my voice slowly growing more sarcastic and hard as I went on. "That's great to know, Edward, but I think I'll keep taking my chances."

"No, it ends now," Edward nearly yelled, the small confinement of the vehicle making his harsh voice echo. "I'm not letting him near you." His lean arms clenched and I noticed his balled up fists when he placed them on his knees.

"It's not always up to you Edward," I stressed, resisting the urge to pull on my own hair in frustration. "I do know how to make my own decisions."

"Not this one!"

"Then which one? Do I get to pick out my own clothes tomorrow? What about my breakfast? Tell me, will I be eating eggs or cereal?" I screamed back.

"Don't be childish," he snapped.

"What's childish is everyone seeming to think I can't make my own chooses, that I need someone to hold my hand and decide everything for me. Well, newsflash, I _don't_. I was on my own for 6 months and I'm still here."

Edward turned his eyes from my face and I knew I had struck a chord. I pushed my words of reassurance down and bit my tongue, knowing I didn't have much footing to stand on when it came to making Edward see that Jacob and the rest of his pack were not the bad guys, and I had just spent the last few minutes arguing stupidly.

"Edward you have to believe me, Jacob would not harm me," I stressed, keeping my voice even, not wanting to start another shouting match. "Even in his wolf form he's never-"

"You were around him like that?" Edward's lethal voice stopped me cold. I looked up into his eyes, not sure if I was frustrated or relieved that I couldn't make them out in the dim light.

"Yes."

My eyes slammed shut at the force behind the growl that erupted from him; it was deadly, ferocious and I had to clench my fists in an effort to not throw my hands up over my ears.

"Damnitt Bella!" he cursed, throwing his head back once more. "What were you thinking!"

"Does it really matter? Everything I'm doing is wrong apparently!" I forcefully turned away from him, leaning into the door as far as I could.

"I didn't mean..." I listened as Edward trailed off, his voice slightly calmer. I heard him chuckle to himself before admitting bitterly, "it seems I also can not control my emotions when it comes to you."

His touch was tender when he reached for my back, caressing it gently. "Bella...love, I just don't want you to get hurt. I didn't mean to imply you have no rights or reasons to make your own decisions."

I sighed deeply, not even trying to hide the fact that I would give in - I always gave in when it came to him. "I know...I get it." And I did. He wanted to keep me safe and in his eyes, Jacob was _not _safe. "But Jacob isn't any danger to me, please understand that." I turned to look into his eyes, to see if he agreed with my decision but he just looked away.

"Do they cross through that area much?" he asked instead, leaning back into the seat.

I crossed my arms and leaned back also, looking back out the window once more. "Maybe, I'm not sure." Without thinking, I admitted with a tired voice, "Jacob would more than the others." 

"Do I want to know why?" he questioned softly, his voice uncharacteristically unsure, catching my attention.

I could see the pictures in his head almost as if I could read minds instead of him. He was upset that I had shared something that was special with us, something he held close to his heart, with another person. That was _our _meadow.

"No...but not for the reason you think." I could feel his eyes on me once more and I sighed deeply, closing my own eyes. I could still feel my fear when I thought back to the day in the meadow when Laurent cornered me and I had finally saw Jacob's wolf side for the first time.

"What's wrong? Your heart is racing..."

"I haven't told you yet why I was hesitant to go into the meadow today," I started slowly, keeping my eyes closed.

"No...you haven't." I took in his calm voice, the way he was he almost hesitant himself, not sure on where I was going with this. I felt his fingers graze my cheek gently then, their coldness a comfort, adding strength and giving me the motivation I needed.

"After you left I fell apart..." I didn't want to rehash this part of the past 6 months but I owed Edward the full truth, if only to make him see how much Jacob meant to me. "I basically collapsed into myself. It took Charlie trying to send me with Renee to make me see what I was doing to myself." 

Once more Edward reached out to me. This time he simply placed a stray hair back behind my ear before letting his hand fall back, tracing my arm in the process. I knew he was trying to console me in a way right now that still allowed me my freedom to express whatever was on my mind but I also knew he needed these touches as much as I did. Those small little reminders to make the memories seem less harsh, less real.

I cringed inwardly as I remembered screaming at Charlie and Renee, who had showed up to take me home with her. I screeched and threw things, I cried for the first time since the week after Edward's departure, and I begged and promised to change, vowing to get better as long as I didn't have to leave Forks.

I licked my lips as I pushed the memory away. "But I didn't really get any better - I just learned to fake it." I laughed bitterly there, getting into the story, the dark interior of the car urging me to say more. I could feel a cocoon almost start to wrap around myself, sealing me tightly in the night and making me feel like I was free to say anything I wanted.

"I tried to reconnect with my friends when Charlie started to talk about me leaving again but everything seemed so hollow to me by then. Jessica, Mike, Angela - they had no idea what I was going through; they barely knew me or you. But Jacob did. I knew he thought the idea of you being a vampire was just old tales passed down from his ancestors but he was the closest thing I had. But...it still wasn't enough."

I took in a deep breath and went on, refusing to open my eyes still; it was easier to get it all off my chest if I didn't have to look at him. It left me to imagine that I was alone and no one was listening, no one was hearing my deepest fears and regrets. "I wanted to find the meadow again; I felt like if I was there maybe...maybe you would be there too," I finished in a rush. "But I didn't know where it was. So Jacob offered to help me find it."

I paused to see if Edward wanted to comment; the silence in the small vehicle was deafening and I become suddenly aware that somewhere along the line he had stopped breathing and moving. The action caused a small tremor of fear to grow in my stomach, urging me to reach out in the darkness, searching for his hand. His cold fingers intertwined with mine and I pulled our joined hands back to rest on my knee.

"After looking for some time Jacob got sick. And then he started to avoid me. He wouldn't answer my calls and when I finally talked to him he acted like he didn't even know who I was - like we hadn't spent every day together for the past few weeks."

"Bella.." Edward's gentle voice startled me and I opened my eyes. He turned in his seat till he was facing me, reaching out with his free hand to caress my cheek and squeezing our interlocked fingers also. "I'm sorry...I know that must have hurt you."

I nodded before taking in a deep breath, determined to finish my story. "I didn't understand at first," I admitted, tilting my head down as I added softly, "he promised he wouldn't leave me - he'd always be there."

I wanted to close my eyes again but forced them open and looked in Edward eyes as I continued, using them as an anchor to keep myself from letting my emotions get the better of me. "After a few days he showed up one night, claiming it wasn't his idea to stay away from me but he couldn't tell me why or what was going on. He hinted that the stories he had told me about you weren't fake - no part of them were.

"Eventually I caught his meaning and started to wonder if there were indeed such things as werewolves. If vampires exist...who was I to say other things didn't? And then I remembered your warning to stay out of the woods and how people were saying there were large bears roaming loose. But I still couldn't believe that Jacob, my Jacob, could be anything but just himself."

I stopped to take in another deep breath, letting it out shakily. Edward, sensing my rising nerves, lifted our hands and kissed my knuckles, never once letting go. I looked up and smiled briefly, thanking him for the small gesture again. I could tell from the stiffness of his back and the lack of speech that this conversation was hard on him too, but I knew I had to keep going; I had to explain everything to him.

"I was hurt once more and angry at Jacob for keeping that from me. But I went into the woods alone one day, needing to feel closer to you." I felt Edward's grip on my hand tighten and I looked up, watching his lips thin into a narrow line. I knew I would hear it later over that bit of information but right now I was more worried about his reaction to what happened next in my story.

"Maybe it was luck or maybe it was fate but I found the meadow that day. But I wasn't the only one there." I glanced up quickly and watched Edward's eyes as I told him, "Laurent was there too."

I watched as his eyes turned into slits and his grip on my hand tightened even more. I felt like my fingers might loose circulation but I didn't break the hold, needing that small contact to help me finish what I had to say.

"I wasn't scared at first," I muttered, thinking back to that day. I reasoned that my stupidity wasn't without merit - he had offered me no harm the first time I had met him and had even spent time with another non-murderous clan of vampires.

"Bella," He let go of my hand and took my shoulders, pulling our bodies closer. His voice was frustrated as he told me, "I don't know how else to express to you how dangerous our kind is. Just because my family and I don't feed on humans doesn't mean others don't!"

"I know, I get it."

"Do you really?" he tossed back, pulling me closer still until I was half on his seat also, his arms wrapping around my waist. "If I had lost you..." Edward trailed off and groaned in frustration, shaking his head. "When I find him-"

"Laurent is dead," I informed him, not waiting for him to question me on just how that was. "Jacob and his pack found us and killed him before he got the chance to attack me. They saved my _life_."

Edward pulled me the rest of his way on his lap, holding me close between his chest and the steering wheel. I leaned into the embrace, closing my eyes as the memories of that day crashed though my mind, reminding myself just how close I had gotten to death that afternoon.

"He did it for her didn't he, for victoria," Edward demanded after a few minutes. When I just nodded and he rubbed my back and placed a kiss on the crown of my head, adding in a hard voice, "she's not coming near you Bella - I won't allow it."

I didn't trust my voice and just nodded once more, but I found my eyes wondering the dark night surrounding the car.

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**Ok...so, yeah, Edward was like a yo-yo in the chapter...mad, sad, annoyed, loveable...I couldn't decide! Please don't flame me:(**

**Melissa**


	10. Girl Talk & Book Clubs

1**A/N : I'm so sorry this took so long to post! I got sidetracked with my nephews coming to stay for spring break and my sister came to visit...not a good excuse, I know, but it's the truth!**

**So enjoy and review!**

**Disclaimer**** : NOT MINE!**

**  
****Chapter 10 - Girl Talk and Book Clubs**

I found sleep tugging at my mind soon once we left the highway, the dimming lights of the wooded surroundings lulling me ever closer to sleep. I fought my eyelids gravely as Edward helped me out of the Volvo, his arm automatically wrapping around my waist. I let him lead me blindly up the front steps of the Cullens Home. Once we were across the threshold he didn't pause to swing me up into his arms, cradling me against his chest like a small child.

"Goodnight Bella." Alice's voice floated into the foyer from the living room.

I mumbled a response as Edward continued forward, taking me right up the steps. While this was indeed comfortable and I appreciated the gesture - it _was _a long walk up to Edward's 3rd floor bedroom - I felt the need to point out, "I could have walked."

Edward though just smiled faintly and said, "and let you fall down the stairs from exhaustion?" I was half-way tempted to argue but I yawned just then, cutting off any reply I might have had.

"My point exactly."

I waved my hand in his direction as he walked into his bedroom and laid me down gently on the large bed. "I'll respond to that tomorrow."

I instantly cuddled up to the soft, velvet blankets, sighing deeply. I felt the bed shift behind me, a slight chill sliding down my spine as Edward pressed his cold chest against my back, molding his body to mine.

"Hmm..." I sighed, feeling even more contend as he started to run a hand through my hair, gently brushing the brown locks back from my face. I felt his finger pause slightly before he continued, the absence only lasting a brief second.

"What?" I asked him softly, my voice already thick with sleep.

I could feel his chest constrict slightly as he took in a deep breath. "You know me too well, I'm beginning to fear." His voice held a hint of a smile as he let his hand come to rest on me.

"No such thing," I pointed out, reaching down to place my hand in his where it laid on my hip.

"No, I guess there is not, seeing as I will never want to stop learning everything I can about you," Edward pondered, picking up my hand and looking at it in the darkened room, his thumb caressing it softly.

I smiled, my eyes still closed. "That's settled then. Now what's wrong?"

"Nothing is wrong," he responded, his voice matter-of-fact. "Esme was just wondering if I would like to join herself and Carlisle for a short hunting trip tonight."

"Oh," I said, having not been expecting that. "Tell her yes, then."

"And why would I do that? I'm quite comfortable where I am right now." To illustrate his point, Edward laid his head down and wrapped his arm firmer around my body, pulling me closer.

This _was _expected. Rolling my eyes, I turned my head slightly and shifted my hips so I could look up into at his face. Edward's gorgeous eyes were darker than normal, making my voice stronger as I argued, "go and feed - I'm just going to be sleeping."

I could see his smile as he reached up and trailed a finger down my cheek. "I happen to like watching you sleep. It's very insightful."

My face flushed and I picked up my hand, pointing toward the bedroom door. "Go."

"But-"

"No 'buts'," I insisted. "Go spend time with your family." When he hesitated I added with a sincere tone, "I'll be fine."

Edward, relunctendly, nodded. After tracing my jaw line tenderly he leaned in, placing a gentle kiss on my lips. "I'll be back briefly. We aren't going very far."

"Ok," I told him, smiling when he quickly placed another kiss on my forehead before climbing out of the bed and sliding out of the room effortlessly. Sighing deeply, I rolled back over, sinking into the thick mattress and sleep almost instantly.

I could feel someone starring at me, the sensation slowly drawing me out of my sleeping stumper. Slightly dazed, I cracked one eye open, lazily looking for the reason of my interruption - I had been having a very nice dream about myself and Edward walking along a moonlit beach somewhere warm and exotic - when I nearly had a heart-attack.

"Jeezes, Alice," I moaned, looking at the bubbly vampire sitting cross-legged at the bottom of my bed. "Make some noise next time, would ya?" My voice croaked and I tried to clear it.

"Yay. You're awake."

Her silvery voice seemed much to hyper and I inwardly groaned, wiping at my eyes as I slowly rolled over. Glancing toward the large window and still seeing the moon peeking through darkened clouds, I asked, "what time is it?"

"3:18 am."

"And what do I have to thank for this un-godly-hour wake up call?" I tried to clear my throat once more, having sounded like something from the 'exorcist'.

Alice, ignoring my tone and obvious dis-like of her at this moment, just sat up straighter and told me, raising her fingers up like a cheap-fortune teller, "I have seen the future..." I raised my eyebrow at her and she dropped her hands and sighed. "Party pooper. You're grumpy in the morning."

I raised myself up on my elbow, the action taking more energy then I felt like excerting. "6 am, 5 at the _earliest_, is morning time. This is still nighttime. And us humans," I placed my hand back on my chest, "we like to sleep at nighttime."

"Keep it up and I'm not gonna tell you what I saw..." she sing-songed, stretching one of her legs out and grinning at me.

I glared at her before letting my elbow drop, falling back into the mattress. I held my resolved for a matter of 6 seconds before I gave up, calling out toward the ceiling, "fine, I give - as I'm sure you knew I would. What did you see?"

She clapped then, crawling up to lay down beside me. "Perfect skies as far as the eye can see tomorrow morning." Her voice had taken on a show-girl quality, sounding just like one the women from the local news.

I just laid for a moment, not understanding what this had to do with me until I looked over and caught a glimpse of Alice's ghostly-white skin. I could still picture Edward's pearly skin shimmering in the glistening sun - there was no way possible for a vampire to walk among any humans in the sunlight.

"Oh," I said glumly. "So I guess that means no school tomorrow."

"For the youngest Cullens," Alice agreed. "Humans only."

I grumbled under my breath, crossing my arms. The idea of going all day without seeing Edward was not something I wanted to think about, much less endure. We had just finally found our way back to each other; I was not looking forward to being forced apart, if even only for a few hours.

"He'll take you and pick you up from school in the Mercedes. Tinted windows," she explained.

"Yeah..."

Sitting up quickly, Alice crossed her legs once again and grinned down at me. "Lets paint each others toe-nails. Or 'play truth or dare'!"

Scoffing, I eyed my friend like she was crazy. "It's 3 in the morning!"

"What's your point?"

"Alice," I whined, pulling a pillow out from my head and laying it across my face. I didn't even feel it slip from my grasp before it was halfway across the room, landing with a soft thud.

"We can talk then."

"About...?"

She thought for a moment before suggesting, "clothes?" I gagged, my mouth turning down. "Make-up? Hair?" When I continued to look repulsed she rolled her eyes and demanded, "than what do you suggest?"

"Sleep."

"Nope. Next."

Sighing deeply then growling with frustration, I sat up finally, crossing my legs and eyeing the annoying dark-haired girl sitting beside me. "Will you leave me alone afterwards?"

"Make it juicy." Alice grinned wickedly, rubbing her hands together like a demented cannibal eying a tasty victim; which in a way she was.

"Fine," I muttered in agreement, reaching for another pillow to hold in my lap. The overly-large pillow seemed to help my resolve as I contemplated telling Alice much more than she needed to know. And much, much more than Edward would be happy with her knowing.

"I, uh, well myself and Edward, had a interesting conversation today," I started, looking downward, already feeling my cheeks flush with embarrassment.

"About..." she prodded me, leaning forward some.

Rolling my eyes, I felt like flinging myself backwards as I told her, my voice low, "sex."

"Oh my gawd!" Alice exclaimed. "Are you two-"

"No!" I nearly yelled, knowing where her question was going. "We just talked about it!"

"Oh..." She backed down some. Looking confused, she simply asked after a beat, "why not?"

I thought about asking her why she didn't look and see for herself but decided not to, not wanting to hurt her feelings. She was obviously trying to be polite by steering clear of _those _kinds of visions.

"He's afraid of hurting me," I told her instead. "He doesn't think it would work...like it should."

"Well, that's just ridiculous. We're still men and woman. He has a peni-"

"Alice!" I squealed, burring my face down in the pillow on my lap.

Laughing, she just waved her hand in my direction. "Well, he does. Besides, he is head-over-heels in love and very much attracted. The way he feels when he looks at you..."

I peeked an eye out at that. "What are you talking about?"

Grinning, Alice looked at the door before scooting in closer, making me wonder quickly who might be within hearing range. But that thought was quickly shoved aside when she told me, whispering, "Jasper told me that Edward's _attraction _for you nearly bowls him over at times."

"What?!" I could feel my mouth hanging open.

She nodded, adding in a rushed and giddy voice, obviously loving our gossip session, "the first time you came by, when we stopped up here and you two where on the sofa," I nodded, knowing exactly when she was speaking of, "Jasper told me later that night that Edward feelings were downright lustful as he pinned you down."

"Even back then?" I exclaimed, making sure to keep my voice low.

Alice nodded. "You seem to forget that he had been watching you since you first arrived in Forks, Bella. He'd had plenty of time to decide what he wanted."

I scoffed in awe and leaned back, taking my pillow with me as I rested against the iron headboard of the bed, but instantly froze.

_If Jasper felt Edward's feelings_...

My face must have shown my horror cause Alice's brow crinkled. "What's wrong? Are you upset cause Edward wants to be intimate?"

"No," I blurted, looking at her like she was nuts. "I want tha-" I stopped mid sentence and smacked myself in the forehead.

"I _knew _it," Alice dished, her voice relishing everything I said.

"This conversation is not happening," I said to myself, rolling onto my side and burring my face down into the pillow.

"Bella...stop hiding. Now tell me what's wrong."

"Alice...please don't make me say it..." I groaned.

"Say what?" she asked. When I didn't respond fast enough for her she added, "whatever it is, I probably already know it so just get over yourself."

Sending her a evil glare, I picked my head up slightly. "If that's the case, then why do I have to say it?"

"It's healthy to talk about this stuff," she explained. "Esme has never shied away about talking with us about sexual experiences."

"Not helping any!"

Sighing deeply, Alice got up on her knees and crawled closer. "Bella...is there anyone else you would rather want to talk about this stuff with?"

Weighing my options, I shook my head no reluntulently. I could never talk this opening about it with Edward cause it was about him. Charlie would have a heart-attack if I mentioned sex and Edward in the same conversation, and Renee would just start her speech about every woman's journey once again. And just the thought of going to Jessica and having her blab to the whole school sent a chill down her spine. And Jacob...Jacob was just not an option.

Plus Alice was closer than anyone to what my subject was about...

"Fine," I muttered. Taking in a deep breath, I asked quickly, my words rushing together, "has Jasper every said if he feels my attraction for Edward?"

Alice was obviously hiding back a grin. "No, he's never mentioned it to me. But he has said you two love each other much more than most people see or understand."

I nodded and looked down once more. I fiddled with the each of my pillow and Alice pondered out loud, "I get him wanting to be careful and all with you being human, but why not at least try? The amount of effort he uses to keep his passion at bay is just mind blowing..."

Shaking my head, I said finally, "he always seems like he's in such good control...well besides today." When Alice eagerly opened her mouth I held up a hand. "Nothing happened, like I said."

She pouted slightly. "Fine, alright, I'll leave it be."

"Thank you."

Sighing, she stood up, her slender body moving graceful enough to seem almost like she was dancing. "I guess I'll leave you be now, like I promised."

Surprised, I sat back up some. "Oh, ok." Truth be told, I was wide awake now and the thought of Alice actually leaving me alone hadn't crossed my mind for a while now.

"Besides," she added with a smile as she pranced toward the door. "I thought I'd give you some privacy to go find Jasper."

I just shook my head as she left the room, wondering why I even thought I might have a semblance of privacy around her. Of course she knew I had been planning on talking to Jasper about my birthday last year; she had probably even maneuvered it so Esme, Carlisle, and Edward left so it would happen. Taking her hint, I climbed out of the bed and briefly stopped to glance in the large mirror gracing Edward's bedroom wall, wasting time running my fingers through my dull hair.

_Stop procrastinating_, I ordered myself, steeling my resolve and walking determinedly into the hallway and down both flights of stairs. I headed into the living room slower, glancing around and finding it empty, but spying the double-doors at the back of the room, leading out onto the back deck.

The air was more than just slightly chilly when I stepped out onto the porch, taking me by surprise. I saw Jasper look up from his chair, a book open in his lap. I smiled in his direction hesitantly, not knowing how he would react to me being out here with him.

Seeing the other chairs surrounding an outdoor coffee table, I pointed to one and asked, "do you mind..."

Slightly shocked but none-the-less polite, Jasper closed his book - holding his spot with a finger. "No, be my guest."

Walking slowly, I decided to not push his tolerance and choose the seat directly across from him, avoiding the right right beside his. When I sat down and robbed my arms to warm them up slightly, Jasper put down his book and leaned forward, catching me off guard by lifting the top off of the coffee table, revealing it to be a portable fire-pit. A few moments later he had a small fire started, the heat already reaching my chilled legs and arms.

"Thank you," I told him gently, touched by his action.

Jasper smiled in return. "I don't think Edward would appreciate it if I let you freeze to death."

"No, I guess he wouldn't," I joked back, sending him a grin also.

"You're nervous," he said after a minute of somewhat awkward silence, his eyes downward.

Opening my mouth, I assured him, "not because of you. Just about what I want to say." Jasper seemed to believe that and nodded, giving me his full attention. Wiping my hands on my knees, I sighed and said, "Esme told me you still feel guilty over my birthday."

Jasper was almost as well-practiced as Edward was with concealing his feelings but I noticed he sat up straighter as my words sunk in. Before he could say anything I rushed on.

"I just want you to know what I have never blamed you for anything that night Jasper. I know you would never intentionally hurt me."

Smiling ruefully, Jasper crossed his long left leg over his right knee, glancing back down at his book. "Not all mistakes are made on purpose."

I sighed sadly, my words soft as I added, "and most mistakes are forgiven."

"Yes, most," he agreed.

Getting an idea, I sat up some in my chair, tilting my head to the side slightly. "Do you remember the hotel room in Phoenix?"

"Of course," Jasper answered, his face slightly confused.

"I was never once frightened or uncomfortable with being there with you. I knew you had my best intentions at heart; you and Alice kept me alive, even though I did everything to make that task difficult," I added, smiling slightly.

"That you did." Jasper smiled also, sharing a knowing look with me.

"Plus look at how long you spent in the car with me on the way to Phoenix. You handled that just fine."

"It was a true test of my willpower," Jasper admitted softly, so low I barely heard him. "The amount of times I thought of sinking my teeth into your neck..."

The deep amount of guilt in his voice made my heart swell for him, no matter that he was just speaking of trying to kill me; all that mattered was the fact that he hadn't, that he had resisted.

"But you didn't. Don't you see that Jasper? You were the one who made me believe I belonged here," I told him, my voice filled with emotion. I had never told him how much his words that night, the night I ran with them, meant to me. He had told me I was worth it, I was worth his family fighting to keep me safe and alive.

"I trust you,"I stressed finally. "There is no need for any guilt between us."

After a moment, Jasper nodded in agreement. "I will try my best." His voice still seemed heavy with unsaid feelings but I knew he would keep to his word - he would try.

"That's all I ask," I said happily, doing my best Alice impersonation, earning a slight laugh from Jasper. It wasn't as light-hearted as I would have liked but it was a start.

Looking serious once more, he told me, "you're a good friend to Alice." He seemed to ponder his words for a moment before adding, "you make her happy, and that makes me happy."

"I love her," I said simply, shrugging my shoulders like it was a given. "Besides, she didn't give me much choice."

"She tends to be pushy like that," he confided in me, smirking.

I laughed and leaned back in my seat, feeling quite at ease now that I had said what I needed to. Nodding toward the book in his lap, I asked, "any good?" When he held up the thick tomb, I read the title, slightly dazed. "'Critical Theory Since Plato'. Wow. That sounds...interesting."

Jasper laughed at the expression on my face. Suddenly he stood up and blurred, racing into the house and back outside in less than a second, a new book in his hand. "This may be more your style."

I took the book from his outstretched hand, smiling when I saw the cover. "A Mid-summer Nights Dream."

Picking his own book up from his seat, he sat back down, reopening it. Settling in, I scooted my seat closer to the fire-pit and curled my feet up under my legs, starting to read with a small smile tugging at my lips.

"Bella, love..."

Hearing my personal Angel's sweet, velvety voice, I stirred slightly.

"Wake up, sweetheart."

Stretching slightly, I opened my eyes to the most beautiful image. Smiling up at his warm eyes, I moaned slightly. "Hi..."

"Hi," Edward said back, his grin wide. "You fell asleep outside, Bella. You're going to catch cold," he added, his tone slightly chiding. "You should be in bed asleep."

Sitting up, I glanced around, noting I was still curled up in the chair on the back deck, my book forgotten in my lap. The sun was just barely starting to break across the tree tops. "Where's Jasper?" I asked, seeing his seat empty.

"He went with Esme and Alice."

I was about to ask where they went when Edward scooped me up into his arms for the second time as of recently and headed inside, going up the first flight of stairs.

Sighing deeply, I nuzzled my face into the crook of his neck. "A girl could get used to this, you know."

"So could I; so could I," Edward whispered back, placing a kiss on the top of my head.

****

**So...I threw a little 'hidden treasure' in this chapter - think of this as an Easter egg hunt ;) Whoever finds it gets a special sneak preview of the next chapter before I post it! (I know, not a great prize but it's all I got)**

**So, here is the hint : Meg Cabot.**

**Happy hunting! LoL**

**Melissa**


	11. Sunshine & Old Friends

**Title **: Full Moon

**Author **: CherryWolf713 aka Melissa

**Disclaimer** : If I owned Edward in real life, do you really think I'd be here at my computer writing fanfic? Trust me, ya'll would never see me again...lol ;) So all due respect sent to Stephenie Meyer - these are her creations, I'm just burrowing them for some fun and I promise to return them as good as new when I'm done...well, everyone but Edward - he may have taken some abuse ;D

**Summary** : Edward returns to Bella in Forks right after her cliff dive. How would things change? How will Charlie react to Edward's return? What about Jacob?

**Pairing** : Edward/Bella, Alice/Jasper, Carlisle/Esme, Rose/Emmett

**Status** : WIP

**A/N **: Well...I'm not dead, so, really, I have no excuse for not posting anything for this story the last 8 or so months. The only I can really say in my defense is that I was sucked into a huge Dark Angel coma and spent the last few months in that side of the site...

* * *

**Chapter 11 - Sunshine & Old Friends**

It took more than a few minutes of the bright light starting to protrude into my subconscious to finally allow my eyes to crack open. The harsh rays instantly made me shut my lids again and groan, bringing a hand up to shield my face.

"Too bright..."

I heard a chuckle from the door then and I rolled over, squinting my eyes. The blurry being in the door came closer, slowly forming into a face and body in my sleepy eyes. His deep, honey eyes glowed as he grinned crookedly, coming to set by my waist on the edge of the bed.

"Morning."

"Morning," I yawned, smiling at his beautiful face. I had a nervous anxiety to run a hand through my hair and dash to his secluded bathroom but refrained from doing so, choosing to just speak downward slightly so he wouldn't catch a whiff of my 'morning breath'; the light was still much too bright and if I didn't give my eyes enough time to adjust I had a feeling I would be limping to the adjacent room.

A quick scan of the room lead my eyes to the un-curtained large window, the breaking sun not even picking up a small smear on the perfect glass. The answer for my torturous blindness earned a small pout on my lips as I was reminded of Edward's departure from my side during school hours today.

"So, I hear you had a busy night last evening after I left," Edward told me conversationally, his hand and arm sparkling as half of his body leaned into the direct sunlight, momentarily rendering me thoughtless as my eyes raked over his skin before his words finally sunk in.

I paused, not sure where he was going with this. Of course I had two reasons for that hesitation, in my head at least. My conversation with Jasper being number one, and my far more personal one with Alice. For some reason I was more convinced he wanted to talk about the latter one than the first. And I did not feel like explaining why I felt the need to talk about our sex - or lack thereof - life with his sister.

I realized he was still waiting for an answer and I shrugged, trying to play my nervousness down. "No more than usual. My life's been very busy as of late." Casually, I pulled back the comforter and scooted off the bed. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I need a 'human' moment."

But my escape was quickly cut off when Edward reached out and grabbed my waist, pulling me back to his lap, my back against his cool chest.

"Not so fast," he told me, pushing some of my hair - which I was sure looked like a haystack - away from my shoulder and placing his chin there. "I spoke with Jasper this morning."

"Oh," I piped in, surprised. My nerves settled down and I leaned into his embrace, almost instantly more comfortable since Alice was not his intended subject. "Well...I thought we needed to discuss some things." I knew my birthday was still a very sore-spot for Edward - we had yet to talk about it _ourselves _- but I also knew he would understand why I went to speak with his newest brother.

"I didn't want him to think I blamed him for anything. That night was an accident," I added.

Edward, reaching around to take my hand, rubbed his thumb across my knuckles. "I'm very proud of you for doing that; he stills carries a lot to guilt around about your birthday," he murmured and I almost opened my mouth to protest that _he _didn't need to feel guilt either - I could hear Edward did in his voice - when he suddenly dropped my hand and pulled me tighter against him, like he thought I was going to try and get away.

"But I actually spoke to him about something else."

"Something else?" I questioned, not liking the tone his voice had taken. It was almost as if he was testing me, his voice annoyed yet slightly playful.

"Yes. My brother seems to have a problem with sharing things with a certain vampire who, in-turn, likes to gossip with my girlfriend."

I tensed instantly, not liking the turn this conversation had taken. _I should have made a break for the bathroom when I had the chance_, I thought glumly.

"I also had a nice long talk with Alice," he added. "She seems to be under the impression that you started the talk and she was just offering sage advice."

_Damn Alice_, I thought darkly. Crossing my arms, I muttered, "I knew it, I _knew _this was what you wanted to talk about..."

"Bella..." Edward warned, his tone hardened.

"Fine, fine," I said exasperated, throwing my hands up some. "Yes, I started it." Throwing a quick and somewhat rude expression over my shoulder, I added, "but you can't really get mad about it."

"Oh, yes I can," Edward assured me.

Scoffing, I twisted in his lap until I was looking right at his face, not letting my eyes wander as they always wanted to do when directed at his magnificent beauty. "You of all people-" Edward rolled his eyes at my voice of words but I ignored him and continued on, "should not take offense, considering what you can do."

"Yes, but I don't go searching for that information," he argued. "You, on the other hand, offered it up to Alice on a silver-platter."

"She's my friend," I stressed.

"She's my sister." When I looked at him, he sighed and added, "you know what I mean."

Squaring my shoulders, I crossed my arms. "Or would you rather have me discussing it with Jessica at school?" I asked him cooly. I knew Edward's feelings on Jessica Stanley, though he had never actually spoken them. He would look nearly in pain every time he turned his attention on her thoughts, clearly annoyed with what he found there.

His eyes instantly turned into slits.

Smiling, I leaned in a pressed a quick kiss to his forehead and bounced up. "I win," I quipped, skipping into the bathroom.

"We weren't finished talking," Edward called out to me but I just grinned even more from the doorway before closing it.

I didn't hear him leave the bedroom but I knew he was more than likely back downstairs, lecturing Alice and Jasper on privacy and what-not. Shaking my head I walked across the large bathroom, turning on the shower. The warm water washed away my thoughts and relaxed my body, sending me into a peaceful hum as I stepped carefully out of the tub a few minutes later. Finding a large and soft towel I wrapped myself up in it, thankful that my back was already healing and no longer sore.

It was then that I realized I had not brought any clean clothes into the bathroom with myself. Gently kicking the scruffy clothes on the floor, I frowned. I had been wearing them since yesterday morning, seeing as how I was partially asleep both times I was placed into bed and never changed into any night clothes.

"Great," I muttered, knowing I was going to have to go out into Edward's bedroom wearing nothing but a towel and a smile. Sighing, I walked forward and slowly opened the door, poking just my head through the small opening. I strained my neck, glancing both ways to see if the path was clear. Not seeing anyone, I dashed quickly from the bathroom, darting for the closet and jumping inside.

Then right back out as I screamed in fright.

"Calm down, Bella."

"Why do you keep doing that?ཀ" I demanded, one hand over my heart and the other keeping a tight hold on my towel.

"Doing what?" Alice asked, her attention back on the clothes now that she assessed I was not having a heart-attack.

"Coming out of nowhereཀ" I accused her. "Give a girl some warningཀ"

Even though she was turned away, I knew Alice was rolling her eyes as she asked, "do you have any green eyeshadow?" As an after thought, she said suddenly, "oh, no worries. I do."

"Wha-green eyeshadow?" I repeated, confused. Then I took in the clothes she was collecting in her arms and I froze. "What are you doing in here, Alice?" My voice was slow and steady as I tried to remain calm.

"Picking out your outfit, silly." I watched as she pulled down a silky looking tank top, my stomach clenching. "Edward said you agreed."

"What?" I demanded. _That little sneak_, I cursed in my head. Gaining some anger, I told Alice clearly and loudly, "he was mistaken."

Turning, Alice pouted, setting her doe eyes on me. "But Bella...I already have one picked out."

"Put it back, then," I told her, not even looking to see what she held.

"But it'll look so good with your hair and eyes - I have the perfect shade of eyeshadow and lipstick to match. Oh, and my brown heels with look so cuteཀ"

My eyes widened in horror at the word 'heel' and I backed up, shaking my head. "No, no way Alice."

"Come on," she pleaded, taking a step closer.

"Noཀ I am not your personal Barbie-dollཀ" I cried.

Suddenly Alice's eyes shifted and she told me, "Bella...I am going to miss my first day back to school. And since I don't get to show off my newly bought designer clothes, I'm letting you. Are you really going to deny me that mere wish?"

"Designer?" I exclaimed, eyeing the clothes anew now. "Aliceཀ How much did all this cost?ཀ"

"Drop the towel, Swan," she just ordered.

Crossing my arms and gripping the edges closer together, I eyed the vampire right back. "No."

I'd like to think I put up a good fight but in the end, I knew it was lost. I was slightly surprised that no one came to my aid while I screamed at Alice, but I figured all the males in the household had learned to never cross Alice while she held weapons of clothes and beauty supplies. I had agreed to the clothes and even let her pick my footwear, but I drew the line when she pulled out a curling iron.

By the time I walked down the curving staircase I didn't feel like myself anymore. Alice was fluttering right behind me, proudly showing off her newest creation, much to my annoyance. My anger, and slight embarrassment combined, made me take the steps faster than normal and I was caught completely off guard when my foot - shoved into a newly bought pair of chunky heels - missed the last step and I tilted forward.

"Got you," I heard Edward say, suddenly there in front of me and easily putting me back on my feet before my face hit the carpet.

"New shoes can be very unpredictable Bella," Alice commented as she stepped around me. "I'd be careful today."

My eyes formed into slits as she danced into the kitchen. "I'm going to break my neck today..."

"You'll be fine!" Alice proclaimed from deep within the house.

I sighed and finally looked up at Edward, not missing the small smirk tugging at his lips. "Can't I play hooky today too?"

"It's a beautiful day outside today. Do you really want to be cooped up inside all day?" he asked. "Plus you'll get to see all your friends today at school."

"Ugh..." I moaned, taking the outstretched book-bag he was holding out to me. "Trust me, they won't miss me..." When he raised an eyebrow, I shrugged and looked down, admitting softly, "I haven't been too talkative lately."

"Well, today would be a good day to remedy that, then," Edward suggested lightly.

Something about his tone made me eye him sharply suddenly. Crossing my arms, I asked wearily, "what's going on?"

Edward had a look of pure innocence on his face now, his eyes wide and alert. "What do ever you mean?"

"You," I offered. "You're acting funny."

"Don't be absurd."

"You're awfully excited about sending me to school alone today..." I informed him as he placed a hand on my lower back and ushered me out of the door.

"That would be because we're running late," Edward offered.

"Uh-huh," I told him sarcastically. "Sure we are."

By the time we reached the school I was almost ten minutes earlier than I normally arrived. I sat in the passenger seat, eyeing my oddly-behaving boyfriend intently.

"Promise me something," I said after a long pause.

Edward seemed slightly wary and told me, "I'll think about it."

Rolling my eyes, I let his reply slide and just told him, "whatever it is you have planned today," I placed my hand up in the air when he started to protest and silenced him, adding, "please keep in mind to be careful."

I wasn't stupid, nor oblivious. Edward was not one to be eager to send me off alone without him, not unless he had something else to do that he didn't want me to be a part of; and that usually meant he deemed it too hazardous to my health.

Even with the sun shining it would be ok for Edward to wonder the woods if he was careful and fast. He could easily track down another vampire if wanted to, and I knew for a fact that he was determined to find one in particular...one who had been hunting my very self as of late.

I could see the realization dawning in his eyes so I quickly went on, stating, "I know you'll do whatever you think is right - no matter what I say - but please...don't do anything foolish today." My voice was catching by the end and Edward reached out, pulling me into his arms and his lap.

"You're right on one account," he told me while pressing his cool lips against my temple. "I will do what I think I have to to keep you safe."

"Even if I don't want you to?" I asked, my voice soft.

"You have nothing to worry about," Edward assured me. "I am more than capable of taking care of myself."

"But-"

"No 'buts," he ordered gently. His voice took a harder edge as he added, "I will make Victoria pay for all she has done - let that be clear."

"But you'll be careful today?" I pleaded.

He laughed then, saying, "I'm more than certain that I will be in no danger today." When I looked even more upset due to his arrogance he quickly asked, "would you like to know what you were mistaken about earlier?"

"Fine," I pouted, crossing my arms.

Trying to hide his amusement to my reaction, he said, "I have no intentions of tracking Victoria today."

"You don't?" I asked, relaxing my pout slightly.

"No, I don't. I have already arranged that action for another time."

That information did little to ease my nerves and I would guess Edward noticed cause he added, "I have something much more special planned for today."

"Like what?" I asked, my interest peaked.

"You'll just have to wait and see," was all he would offer. When I tried the pout again he just laughed and kissed my forehead. "It's time for school."

I whined dramatically but slide off of his lap, reaching for the door handle. Careful to shield any sunlight that might filter in with my body, I stepped out of the dark car, reaching back in to grab my book bag.

"Oh, before I forget," Edward stated suddenly, reaching into his pocket and pulling out his cell. "This is for you."

Leaning back into the car, I took the small cell. "This is your phone."

"I am well aware of that." When I arched an eyebrow, he just shrugged. "I can get another one."

Sighing, I shook my head. "Edward-"

"Please, Bella. It would ease my nerves quite much today."

Knowing how he felt - the idea of spending any time away from him now that he was back made my stomach fill with knots and my heart constrict - I sighed once more but willingly put the phone in my pocket. "I seriously doubt I'm gonna be in danger at school..." When Edward raised just his one eyebrow and eyed me, I mentally thought back on my track record with impending dangers and finally admitted, "fine..._much _danger."

Sending me his trade-mark crooked smile, he leaned over and quickly pressed his lips against mine, making my heart jump erratically. I was smiling when he pulled back but my face slightly fell some when I noticed his annoyed and semi-angry expression as he looked over my shoulder, obviously hearing or seeing something I couldn't.

Before I could react he turned back to me and stated, "I'll be right here at 3."

"Ok..." I said back, confused slightly. "I'll be waiting."

He sent me one last dazzling smile and I waved sadly before shutting the door, turning to suddenly notice more than one person eyeing the expensive and unknown car.

Tyler Crowley, one of the few onlookers, wandered slightly closer as Edward reversed. "Is that a Mercedes?"

"A Mercedes S55 AMG," I replied automatically, knowing everything about that certain car. I realized how that sounded and added quickly, "or so I've been told."

Feeling unnerved under the confused eyes of my classmates, I turned and headed from the parking lot, heading for my first class of the day. English was normal and I found myself edgy for the bell to ring, hoping that the day would fly fast so I could see Edward once more.

"Hey," Mike called out after the class ended, catching up to me as I exited the classroom.

"Oh, hey Mike," I offered, distracted as I stared up sullenly at the morning sun.

"Nice day today, huh?"

"Oh yeah, nice..." I muttered, figuring afterwards, by Mike's reaction, that it may have been a tad harsh. "It is a change, isn't it?" I offered finally, forcing a softer tone in my voice.

"A couple of us were thinking, if the sun keeps up, of maybe taking a trip down to the beach this afternoon. You game?"

"Actually, E-" I stopped myself short, not finishing the name. It would be plainly obvious tomorrow morning when I arrive with Edward and his family that they were back in town; and it would also be clearly obvious that we were very much back together. But how would it look today to claim he was back when no one had seen him - or would with all this damn sunlight - after so many months of depression from missing him? Would they all think I was nuts and just imagining him?

_Hadn't I did the same exact thing when he first showed back up_, I though to myself.

Knowing Mike was waiting for my reply, I told him gently, "I already have plans - sorry."

Nodding, Mike gave me a small, sad smile. "Well, it is kinda late notice."

"Maybe another time," I offered.

"Maybe. Plus it's not like La Push is going anywhere, right?"

"Right," I added lamely, my mood souring even more.

"Hey - isn't your little friend from down there? Jack or whatever?" Mike said suddenly, his voice trying to be light but failing miserably.

Knowing the little reference was directed to his age, not his size, I cleared my throat and said, "Jacob."

"Yeah, him."

Not liking the direction of this conversation, I forced a smile and suddenly told Mike, "I better get going. I'll catch you in Spanish."

Quickening my walk, I raced to my next class, trying and failing miserably at not thinking of Jacob. Had he heard yet about mine and Charlie's fight? Was he slowly and methodically cutting me out of his life now that the Cullens' had returned?

Did he hate me now?

By the time lunch was rolling around my mood had not improved; if anything, I was even more sullen. Jacob being brought up had quickly soured my whole day, almost seeming to offer all my other negative aspects as of late up with it. I fretted about Jacob in second period, worried about how my Dad was managing alone during third and agonized over Edward's plans for the day all through fourth.

I lagged my feet as I went in the vague direction of the cafeteria, not in the mood to make small talk when suddenly my pocket vibrated and I looked down, slightly shocked until I remembered Edward's cell and fished it out. "Hello?"

"Isn't this much better than going all day with no contact?"

As soon as his velvet voice hit my ears a smile tugged at my downward lips, lifting them easily. "You have no idea."

I had tried to keep the downtrodden quiver from my voice but edward picked up on it immediately, his non-ability to read my mind making him more so much more attuned to my voice.

"I take it you day has not improved?"

I sighed, not wanting to ruin his obviously good mood by bringing up Jacob. "You could say that." Getting closer to the lunch-room, I slowed my walk even more. "I miss you."

"I now that feeling very much," Edward promised me, his voice hauntingly sad.

"I wish the darn sun would go in so you could come and be with me now," I told him.

Edward chuckled and agreed. "I would love nothing more, but I am a slight distance away at the moment."

"Meaning..." I trailed off, figuring that maybe he was out in the woods, enjoying the nice day away from spying eyes or maybe even hunting with his family.

"Meaning I am not in town at the moment."

Something in his tone caught my attention and I stopped walking, coming to stand near the cafeteria doors. Our conversation in the car this morning flashed through my mind and I instantly panicked. "You promised not to do anything rash this morning."

"And I am keeping that promise as we speak."

"Then what _are _you doing?" I asked, still not satisfied with his answer.

"Shopping."

I almost asked how, before I recalled Alice telling me that sometimes she drove up to Seattle on sunny days and parked in the underground garage under the mall up there, not having to worry about the light. "Oh," I said then, slightly surprised by his answer. But then another thought accord to me and I quickly starting panicking again. "Shopping for what?"

"This and that," Edward answered me, his voice aloof.

"This and that for who?" His silence was the only answer I needed. "Edward..." I groaned, knowing that he was more than likely going to buy me something I didn't want him to. "Whatever you bought, return it."

I could hear his under-the-breath grumble across the phone. "Is it really that bad that I want to buy you something nice?" he demanded. "Most people would enjoy getting a present every now and then."

"I'm not most people," I argued. "It's not right..."

"But what if it's something you need?"

"I don't need anything. I have everything I want."

"Fine. It's something I want you to have then," he tossed back, evidently not giving in.

I opened my mouth to argue when I paused, my eyes going wide. "My truck better be there when I get off school," I told him. Edward would love nothing more than to buy me a new vehicle; the subject was brought up nearly every time he climbed into my truck.

"Bella..."

"Edward," I threatened, my tone hardening.

He sighed deeply. "Bella, do you really think I would do something of that caliber behind you back?"

Instantly guilt flared up in my stomach and I paused. But then a voice in the background, a voice much to high to belong to Edward, rose loud enough for me to hear and my paranoia soared to new heights.

"Edward..." I heard the silvery voice again and felt my heart jump when the word 'car' was mumbled. "What is Alice doing with you?"

There was quick sound of the cell changing hands than Alice's joyful voice filled my ears. "Duh, shopping. I'd thought I'd be nice and keep Edward company today."

Again the phone switched hands and it was Edward's voice that told me, "more like forced company, but I guess the sentiment still stands."

"Oh," Alice's voice called out from somewhere beyond the cell, "tell Bella that there's a wet spot in the cafeteria near the south end doors. Be prepared - I did not spend two hundred dollars on those capri's for her to spill ketchup all over them."

"What" I squeaked, my voice skyrocketing. I saw a few students stop to turn in my direction. I shot them my most withering glare for eavesdropping then spun around, trying to gain some privacy. "Two _hundred _dollars!"

"Bella-"

"All those clothes...All of them are going back, you tell her that. All of them, Alice!" I rose my voice on the end, knowing she would hear me. "She better not have removed those price tags yet!"

"Bella," Edward tried again before adding, his voice slightly annoyed, "Alice, I am not-"

"I mean it, Edward. Tell her that if she even thinks about buying me anything today that I will accidently forget to take my lipstick out of my pocket before washing my clothes."

I could hear Alice's audible gasp. "But-but you don't even wear lipstick," she argued.

"You know what," I added, my voice lifting like I had just gotten the best idea of my life. "I think I'll use the south exit of the lunch room today..."

Even without the phone in Alice's grasp, I could hear her growl. "That is a Anna Sui shirt."

"A who?" As soon as the words left my mouth I could hear Edward sigh in annoyance, his insight into Alice's thoughts not making him happy at the moment.

Alice, though, she didn't go into a detailed description of the designer like I had thought she would. Instead, her sugar-filled voiced asked, "so, Bella, pink or purple?"

"Excuse me?"

"Your car, silly? What color? I'm thinking maybe purple cause, lets face it, with your skin tone pink doesn't really work."

I could feel the color drain from my cheeks and I sputtered lamely before I squeaked out, "Edward..."

"Oh," he suddenly exclaimed, his voice dry. "Am I still needed? And here I thought I was just a prop used to hold a phone."

I grunted in annoyed fashion at his absurd jealousy. "You can't let her get rid of my truck!"

His huff was much more annoyed than mine, and yet also very dignified at the same time. "Your truck is fine, Bella."

Alice snorted then added, her voice more subdued now. "Fine. But the clothes stay."

I didn't bother to comment on her condition. I had a feeling that if I did actually try to get rid of the clothes she had brought that all my old ones would suddenly meet the very large fireplace in the den. "And it will be exactly like I left it this morning? No extra...anythings?"

"You are extremely paranoid," Edward commented, like he was completely amused by my attachment to the hulking chevy I owned.

"I mean it, Edward. No new car, no fixing up my old one. Promise me."

"Bella," he stressed, his voice annoyed once more "I give you my word that no one will lay a finger on your truck. Now, if you were to change your mind, I would be more than happy to get you a nice little Audi coupe or maybe a 4 door Chevy Avalanche."

I rolled my eyes at this ploy. "Not a chance - I love my truck the way it is."

"I know," he said finally, clearly confused and annoyed with my statement.

I rolled my eyes and sighed then, knowing we would be hanging up soon. "I guess I should get to lunch..."

"Tell Angela we said hi," Alice added suddenly.

Edward ignored his sister, saying to me,. "I'll be there soon, I promise."

After saying goodbye, I slowly closed the small silver phone, pocketing it once more before heading into the cafeteria. The slight clack of my new heels messed slightly with my concentration as I headed for the food line, the usual quietness of my sneakers gone. It wasn't until I had paid for my food and was walking toward my usual table that I felt the slight nagging suspicion that I was being watched.

This, of course, was usually very normal for me. Edward's eyes never strayed very far from my presence when he was nearby. And while he had not been nearby, my semi-catatonic lifestyle had turned a few heads. Then there was the whole other aspect of being watched, the side that harbored deadly hunters with ruby eyes and strong desires to make me feel pain. But this feeling, the stomach-turning and tight shouldered feeling reminded me of my first day here in Forks, which in my opinion was worse than Victoria and James combined.

Shaking off the feeling I continued on, choosing a chair toward the end of the table. I shared a small smile with Angela Webber, who was seated across from me. Again I felt eyes on me and gave into my curiosity finally, eyeing the other students near me. No one seemed to be openly staring, which was a relief, but the feeling still didn't fade away.

"Do I have something on my face..." I muttered finally, starting to turn back around but freezing slightly when I heard a snicker from my right. My eyes zeroed in on Lauren Malloy and I squared my shoulders. To say that mine and her's relationship was rocky would be putting it nicely; Lauren seemed to have hated me from day one of my moving here, due to but probably not solely cause of Tyler Crowley's little crush on me last year. And I felt the severe dislike right back due to her turning Jessica Stanley and half of the rest of my human friends away from me. And because she hated me first.

Angela, quickly looking between myself and Lauren, turned back to me and offered, her voice friendly, "you look nice today, Bella."

I blinked once before I offered shyly, my face growing hot immediately from the compliment, "thanks."

So that was what the looks were about? My makeup and clothes? Did I really dress that shabby usually that this little change caused so much attention? I cataloged my clothes in my head, rethinking my usual wardrobe. My thoughts were sure to have made Alice do a happy dance had she been here.

"What's the occasion?" Lauren cooed, her sugary voice grating to my ears.

Tossing a similar fake smile back, I just said, "no occasion." I briefly let my mind flirt with telling her the truth - "oh, it's just that Alice, the vampire sister of my ex-ex boyfriend Edward Cullen, who's back in town and once again dating me by the way, decided that my normal and obviously horrible, if I go by everyone's reactions, clothes needed a make-over and she forced me at fangpoint to let her dress me and do my make-up" - but I figured the short and sweet version would rile her up even more.

Besides, considering how I believed her to be evil-incarnate, I'm sure the news that vampires were real wouldn't really surprise her.

I watched her eyes turn to slits and I just turned away, ignoring the whispers playing between her and Jessica now. Almost at once conversations started up again at our table, as if it was obvious that a battle had been won. I sighed inwardly and eyed my food, pushing it around on my tray absently.

"So, whose in for the beach after school?" Mike questioned, eyeing everyone in turn as they either declined or accepted. My cringe was barely contained before he turned in my direction. When he reached me he smiled, adding in a last ditch effort to comply me into accepting, "Bella? What do you say? It'll be fun."

I tried to make my smile as sincere as possible. "Sorry, Mike. Like I said earlier, I have plans."

"Hot date?" Lauren questioned, her tone sarcastic.

I dropped my fork as anger started to burn through my veins, her tone not helping my sour mood. I was intending to unleash my pent-up nervous energy onto the other girl by stating just what my plans were but I froze at the last second, the same insecure reasoning from earlier keeping me from revealing that the Cullens had ventured back into Forks.

I opened my mouth, not entirely sure what was going to come out when Angela suddenly spoke up, saving me from replying.

"You know, I heard it was going to rain this afternoon," she informed the table, her voice it's usual gentle tone.

Everyone started to groan in disappointment for the lost trip, quickly taking the heat off of myself as they tried to come up with another plan for the afternoon. I spared a small smile to Angela then rose from my seat, not feeling like dealing with anymore trivial school drama. Avoiding the south doors, I headed for the nearest bathroom, quickly dipping inside and stopping in front of one of the mirrors.

I sighed deeply and reached for the hot water knob, intending to wash my hands when my jean pocket vibrated for the second time that day. The phone was at my ear instantly.

"Hello?"

"Seriously though, they have the cutest little store up here and-"

"I said no, Alice," I repeated, shaking my head and shutting the phone to end the call before she could protest.

"Alice?"

The soft voice made me jerk my head up and turn, finding Angela standing behind me, her eyes curious.

"Um," I faltered, looking down at the phone like it held the answer. After a beat I put it away and shrugged.

Angela walked up to stand at the sink beside mine, her shy face slightly red, looking guilty or embarrassed for speaking up.

"Yeah, Alice Cullen," I told her finally.

"Oh." Shock colored her eyes briefly before she smiled gently. "Well, that's nice, her keeping in touch."

I nodded. "Yeah..." I could hear the sinking tone of my voice and saw Angela stiffen beside me, like she was waiting for something to happen. It took me a few moments to realize she was waiting for me to withdraw, to fade away once more.

"Hey Ang," I called out finally, my voice thick as I looked down.

"Yes?" she answered.

"Thanks for today." When she looked slightly confused, I offered, "at lunch, with Lauren."

And shy little Angela Webber smiled then, her grin looking anything but innocent. "It was my pleasure."

I couldn't help but flash her a returning grin.

"They're convinced you're trying to win the guys over again," she told me suddenly, her voice hinting that she found it ridiculous.

I let out a scoff. "Yes, cause I tried so hard before."

"That was my opinion also," she agreed with a small laugh. "Though even without you trying, you do seem to be succeeding."

Before I could even really think about that comment, I opened my mouth and the words were flowing out, asking, "can you keep a secret?"

The slight vibe of excitement flowing through my voice must have caught her attention because Angela turned her whole body my way. "Of course."

Licking my lips, I paused to glance around the room quickly, just to make sure that we were still alone. Still in the clear, I allowed my self to start to smile slowly. "Alice wasn't just checking in with me..."

"She wasn't?" Angela asked, her voice confused.

"No," I answered, shaking my head. Taking in a deep breath, I told her, "the Cullens' moved back home."

Angela blinked her eyes several times before she responded. "Oh..."

I was confused, wondering if the natural human reaction to avoid vampires, the natural reaction I seemed to be missing, made Angela leery of their return. "You're not happy to see them back," I said finally.

"And you are you?"

"Of course." My answer was instantaneous, a reaction of sort. Angela looked down slightly then. "Angela?"

"It's just..." The tall brunette looked up then, her face pinking slightly. "You were so hurt when he left, Bella...I don't want to see it happen again."

I was expecting everyone to be surprised when they learned of the Cullens reappearance, but Angela's reaction made me pause. She was worried about me, her soulful and timid face genuine.

"I love him," I said then, wanting to make her understand suddenly, to make her see and accept Edward in my life. "He loves me. That's all I need to know."

Angela nodded then, her smile returning some. "Then that's all I need to know." She seemed to be debating something in her head before adding, her voice hesitant, "if you ever want to talk..."

"I'll keep that in mind," I promised, my smile gentle and genuine. She nodded then and turned around, leaving the bathroom. Almost at once Edward's cell vibrated again.

"Yeah?"

"You know, I always liked Angela. We should have her over for a sleep-over one night."

"Goodbye Alice," I went to shut the phone, but stopped at the last second, my brief stint at lunch and Angela's revelation about the guys rolling through my head. "Hey..."

"Yes." she replied instantly.

I stopped, wondering if she was answering my unsaid question or just replying to me. The eye-roll was evident in her voice as she told me, "duh, Bella, I knew what you were going to ask. And yes, Mike is planning on making a move on you again, much to Edward's cringe."

I groaned then and closed my eyes. "Great...so looking forward to that."

"Edward seems to be under the impression that it's my fault, but I fail to agree."

"No, it's just my luck," I muttered.

Alice laughed then, the silvery sound like bells tinkling. "Have fun in Spanish."

She was still giggling when I hung up on her a second later.

Why? Why me? What did I do to deserve all this attention? I was ordinary and dull in Phoenix. Not any of the guys even paused to look twice in my direction there, but here...

I looked into the mirror, examining my face. Besides some more color, I didn't think I looked all that different from my normal self. Alice had kept to the basics, just highlighting my natural features, she had explained to me. My skin was still ghastly pale, even with the added rouse, my natural skin-tone refusing to change under the town's almost constant downpour. What did they see that I couldn't?

Turning my head to the side, I tried to imagine my skin even whiter, the tone almost seeming too crystal clear to be real. Golden eyes would replace my dull brown ones and all the small flaws of my face - too thin lips, low cheekbones - would reshape and reform into perfection.

I held the image in my head. Would I fully be up to Edwards caliber then? Would I finally be beautiful? Even with most human's natural instincts to avoid the Cullens, it was obvious that everyone believed them to be flawless and in-humanly perfect. There wasn't one male in school who would turn from Rosalie when she walked by, nor one female who wouldn't sigh if Jasper deemed them worth talking to.

The need and want to finally be a part of Edward's family tugged at me suddenly, made me revisit all my fantasies from before; from before I thought that possibility was lost, from before I knew for sure what it was like to be away from them, from before Edward had left. The intense longing clenched my stomach and I swallowed deeply. It made me realize that all those months apart did nothing to quell me from wanting to spend an eternity of nights with him; I needed him by me always.

The last months passed by my eyes, the barren time gloomy without him by my side. A few memories toward the end lightened up some, due to Jacob's presence, making me sigh deeply in pain. Jacob was not a safe subject to visit at the moment so I pushed him away quickly, locking my memories away for now. I shook my head and looked back up at the mirror, my eyes having drifted during my daydreaming.

I barely controlled the urge to scream as bright, blood-ruby red eyes stared at me from the glass.

Almost instantly the image was my own face again, my normal brown eyes back in place, clouded over with fear. I blinked my eyes rapidly, trying to dispel the image from my brain. My hands were shaky as I turned on the sink, blindly washing my hands so I'd have something else to focus on.

_It wasn't me_, I told myself. _It won't ever be me._

I knew deep down that I wouldn't be like that; Edward wouldn't allow me to feed on humans, he'd make sure I was kept safely away till my resistance and control was better. He wouldn't let me be a monster. But would Jacob see me that way? Would I just be another _leech _in his eyes? Could I handle that?

I gave up on washing my hands and quickly exited the bathroom, knowing I was in no shape to face the rest of school before I collected myself. Lunch was barely still in session as I wandered outside, other students starting to head to their next classes early. It wasn't until I was insight of the parking lot that I considered ditching the last two classes of the day. I walked closer toward my escape, never-minding that my truck wasn't there.

It was while I was still going back and forth in my head on whether it was worth to start walking when I heard the all-too familiar rumbling engine turn into the gravel parking lot. My eyes shot up instantly, shock written across my features. I felt my feet pick up the closer I got to the black motorcycle, nearly reaching him at a dead run, my heart hammering in my chest.

"Jacob..."

* * *

**Again, so sorry for the long time between posting. Since I already have in mind what I want to happen in the next chapter, it shouldn't be as long as a wait - that and I have people who know me in real life reading this now and they will threaten me with bodily harm if I take too long in updating...**

**Peace, Love, Twilight**

**Melissa**

**(I know, I know, totally corny but I couldn't help myself...lol)**


	12. Confrontations

**Title : **Full Moon

**Author : **CherryWolf713

**Summary : **My slightly AU version of 'New Moon'. Basically, this is what I think would have happened if Edward had came back on his own.

**Pairing : **Edward/Bella, Alice/Jasper, Rosalie/Emmett, etc.

**Status : **WIP

**Disclaimer : **I'm just borrowing them and I promise to eventually give them back…

**A/N : **Yeah…no excuse's for my year-long absence…this chapter has been a long time coming, so here it is

* * *

**Chapter 12 - Confrontations**

I slowed to a stop when I was within a few feet of the black motorcycle, my eyes wide with confusion and joy. "Jake? What-" I gasped with surprise and shock when he suddenly snatched me up off the ground, his large arms nearly squishing all the air out of my lungs. As it was, the force knocked my bag out of my hand, flinging it a good 15 or so feet away.

"Are you ok?" Before I could answer he sat me back down, ignoring my huge intake of air and disgruntled look from being squashed. "Why didn't you call me?" he demanded, his tone hard now.

"Call?" I questioned. Hadn't I just talked to him the day before? Plus, I was sort of under the impression that he wouldn't have enjoyed a call from me quite yet, what with my choosing Edward over him and, with them back, it was obvious who he thought my allegiance fell with.

"Bella," Jacob scolded - scolded! - placing his hands on my shoulders and bending down, putting his face right in front of mine. I bristled at his tone but was ignored, making my ire build even further. "Where you even going to tell me? I had to go by your place to find out!"

I was dying to let loose with a mouthful of information on just how much I appreciated his tone when I fell short, my mind trying to catch up with his words. He knew; he knew me and Charlie were fighting and I had moved out. I couldn't hide my grimace and Jacob's face hardened even more. _Crap_, I thought glumly. This moment had been trickling in the back of mind, like a faucet someone forgot to turn off all the way. Each drop whispered to me, almost guiltily, _how am I gonna tell Jacob_?

Logically, it shouldn't be this hard. We were both teenagers, the same age - give or take a few years, that is, though he looked much older than me now…stupid genetically-superior werewolf. Fighting with our parents is kinda what we do; it's almost required. Plus, me and Jacob both were the ones to patronize our dads - in a way, we ran the household while Charlie and Billy worked around us. So of course he would buck up too if Billy tried to suddenly lay down the law about something or someone he cared about. He would understand all that, I was sure of it. The snag was, though, when it came down to who Charlie was against me seeing. And, unfortunately, Jacob was fully on my Dad's side.

"You went by Charlie's?" I asked finally.

"I was looking for you."

"Jacob," I started, taking in a deep breath. Best to just face his anger and get it over it. I wasn't sorry for my actions exactly, but I was upset over the hurt it was causing. But I wasn't going back to my Dad's till he saw reason. "I'm so sorry-"

"You should be," he interrupted, letting my shoulders go to run his hands through his hair.

"I woulda called you Jake, I would have," I rushed to comfort him. "But I figured you were still mad at me…"

"Being mad at you is different than not caring that you were in danger!" Jacob flung at me. Something in his tone lead me to believe that he was hurt by my actions, like I had somehow made this big mess even worse. Great, just great.

"Jake…Edward-"

"Oh, I see," he sneered suddenly, cutting me off and turning to pace a few feet away from me before spinning back around. "Now that the leech is back you don't need us lowly werewolves, your _friends_."

"That's not fair…" I argued faintly, looking downward. Was that how it looked from the pack's point of view? Did they all hate me now for staying with Edward and his family? Would I be considered some kind of traitor? It hurt me to think they all just assumed I would turn my back on them like that.

"After all the tracking we did to find the monster and you don't tell us?"

I looked back up, perplexed by his words. "Wait-tracking?" I could feel my face scrunch up with confusion. What did them hunting Victoria have to do with me and Edward living together?

Jacob rolled his eyes. "Did you really think I wouldn't smell them? You're whole property reeks of the bloodsucker…"

"Jake…you knew Edward and Alice were at the house," I told him slowly, wondering it his shifting was starting to mess with his memory.

"No shit, Sherlock," Jacob tossed out, earning a quick look from me due to the cussing.

"Then what are you talking about?" I demanded, my tone hardening like his was. I was thoroughly confused now. "if you're not here to chew me out over Edward, then I'm lost!"

"I'm talking about the other vamp's scent all over your yard Bella."

I reared back automatically, floored by his words. Other Vamp?

I swallowed deeply, but my voice was still dry when I asked, "One of the Cullen's? Maybe one of them ran past there for some reason."

But Jacob was shaking his head no before I had even finished the sentence. "No, it was the redhead."

Victoria. My worst nightmare…

"What?" I mouthed, my fear suddenly skyrocketing. I could feel my breath starting to came in smaller gasps, my ears starting to ring. She was there, at the house while I was off with Edward and Charlie was alone. Close; she had been so close, _too_ close. And I had no clue.

"Where's my Dad?" I suddenly asked, reaching out to grab Jacob's arm. I hadn't talked to him since the other morning, since our huge explosion. Who knew what could have happened in between that time and now.

He eyed my face then my hand before saying, "He's at work…"

"Are you sure? We have to check, we have to make sure!" I nearly screeched, my words running over each other.

"You didn't know she was there?"

"No! we have to make sure he's ok!" My voice had risen even more and I could feel the panic start to take over. Blind fear lead me forward, my feet crunching the gravel as I raced toward the road. I had yelled at Charlie, screamed and threw a fit before running off. Those couldn't be our last words. If I never got to see him again, to set things right and apologize…I couldn't let that happen.

"Bella," Jacob said, grabbing me around the waist.

"I have to check on Charlie," I argued.

"Just wait a second!" he implored, using his free hand to pull a cell out of his pocket. It looked ridiculously small in his large hands as he quickly dialed before placing it against his ear. "Hey. Yeah, I found her. Charlie?" He caught my eyes. "He's at work."

I felt like a huge boulder had been lifted off my shoulders. I fell still in Jacob's hold, trying to calm my breathing down and relax my muscles. Charlie was ok. He was at work and still oblivious to my horror. As long as that stayed constant I could deal; we would get the chance to reconcile, to patch everything up.

Maybe it was cause I had stopped fighting or maybe it was cause I was actually thinking of something else other than Charlie's safety, but I could suddenly feel the tension in Jacob's arms; I could feel how tight he was pressing me to his side, how closely he was keeping me.

"I know," Jacob nearly growled into the phone, his voice low. I looked up at his face just as he was shutting the cell, catching the hostile gleam there before he shut it down, pushing the emotion away.

"Sam?" I asked.

He nodded. "I called the pack as soon as I smelt it."

It was my turn to nod. My mind was a jumble of conflicting emotions and thoughts. Pure happiness at being reunited with Edward, sadness from mine and Charlie's fight, nervousness over the future of me and Jacob's friendship, and a sudden stark-white terror brought on by Victoria's re-appearance. The one bright spot in that was Charlie's safety. With that knowledge I could step back a few feet from the situation and look at it from a emotionless standpoint. Victoria's main target wasn't at the house. She obviously wasn't interested in using Charlie as a lure, unlike James had.

"It doesn't make sense.." I said to myself. What was the point? She didn't gain anything from the excursion, except maybe information. I paused at that thought, pretty sure I had hit the mark. Victoria was well aware of the Cullen's. Who and what they were, how deadly they could be; it was Emmett and Jasper who had finished off her lover, after all. She saw how intent Edward was about protecting me, would know he'd kill to keep me safe.

Edward's smell was all over my house. And not even just his, but Alice's too; Not to mention Jacob's and his pack. Did she even make it into the house before she fled? All those smells must have made for a very big confrontation in her head. Would she think it was worth it to push her luck, to try and get inside for a closer look…

"I need to check the house," I said finally, squirming to be free. "Let me go." Jacob obliged and I started fast-walking toward the road, holstering my bag up on my shoulder when I reached it, not wasting any time.

"You're going walk? Where's your truck?"

"Edward's," I answered without looking back. His motorcycle cranked after that, the sound not drawing my attention as I set out on my hike. More than ever I was regretting to decision to let Alice have her way that morning. Didn't she see that I was going to need my sneakers?

I froze, my bag slipping from my fingers. Alice… How did she not see all this? Victoria had been _much_ too close for comfort. How could her visions let this slip through when she saw the most mundane things like me slipping on ketchup in the cafeteria?

"Hop on," Jacob said, stopping by my side a second later. When I didn't answer him he put kickstand down and jumped off, seeing my blank face. "Bells?"

"She didn't see her at my house. How it that possible?"

"What are you talking about?"

I ignored his question, instead focusing on him himself, another thought bursting into my head. "You…you didn't see you the other morning either. It was a huge surprise."

I could see the realization dawn in his eyes. "The freaky future-serer leech? She can't see me?"He smirked. "Awesome."

I huffed. "Think about it Jacob. Alice didn't see Victoria at Charlie's. She didn't see any of it." I could suddenly understand Alice's sourness from being 'blind' around Jacob. The idea of not being able to see Victoria's next move was almost paralyzing.

It also didn't help that since Alice couldn't see Jacob, she probably couldn't see the other werewolves. And since, as far as I knew, werewolves were the only thing she couldn't see, the only things able to make the future/present of those nearby to also disappear, well…the calculations in my head were not very pleasant to be thinking.

I guess the stress was showing on my face cause Jacob tried to reassure me. "Hey, it'll be ok. We made it through the last few months without any hints at what was coming."

I took in a deep breath, forcing the dark thoughts about Jacob's pack out of my head. They were the good guys, after all. They'd spent these last few months keeping me safe from the vamps. Why would they suddenly up and start working with them?

"Come on, lets get you home."

I paused, thinking back to Jacob's anger after talking on the cell with Sam. "Don't you have to get back to La Push?"

Jacob shrugged casually. "They can survive a little bit longer without me."

I relented and climbed on the bike behind him, my mind preoccupied with other things. Any other time I would have enjoyed the ride but my nerves ruined the moment, the fear and doubts clouding my mind. In almost no time we pulled up in front of the house. I stiffly climbed down, my eyes roaming the property for even the smallest difference. I saw none.

It was a long-shot, I knew, but I still couldn't stop myself from asking, "are you sure the smell didn't come from one of the Cullen's?"

Jacob sighed, seeming disgruntled at having to explain it all to me. "Like I don't know that damn vamp's scent after all this time; been tracking her for weeks now. Besides," he added, his tone turning getting even more irritated, "all of the Brady-bunch bloodsuckers smell similar. From living together or something, I guess."

The way he said made me think he wanted to use a different word than 'living'. I took that in, my mind going over it all. It made sense. Everyone's house had a different smell and those smells wore their way into your clothes, your hair; hell, even what you ate made a difference. And since all the Cullen's were 'vegetarians', well, that would make them smell even more alike, wouldn't it?

"I don't know if she made it inside…"

Jacob's words hit me and I blinked, coming back from my inner musings. I could see it, I could picture Victoria at the end of my fathers bed, her wild flowing hair a flaming halo around her pale face, her red eyes gleaming, lips twisted back…

I slammed my eyes shut, trying to dispel the horrid thought. "No…she couldn't have…Alice woulda seen _that_, at least…"

Jacob snorted. I opened my eyes back up and sent him a look before finally starting to walk forward. When I reached the steps Jacob bounded up them before me, holding his hand out for the key. I gave it over, trusting his eyes and nose to go first. The door creaked open and he paused, turning to toss me a look.

"Gimme a second, ok?"

"You think she's…" I trailed off, looking into the house. The hallway seemed darker than usually, almost menacing. Just the thought of her being in there turned my whole home into something sinister and twisted.

Instead of assuring me that I was safe like Edward would have, Jacob just shrugged. "She wouldn't be out here," he pointed out with a glance at the sun drenched lawn.

I consented and watched his back disappear into the door, his footsteps not making a sound. A couple beats went by before I blinked, turning to look away from the empty doorway, a shiver making it's way down my spine. I paced the length of the porch twice before the shade got to me - I needed to be in the sun; Victoria wouldn't be out in the light, Jacob had pointed out. So, ergo, in my head anyway, the sun was safer. Of course, I knew deep down that sunlight didn't actually hurt vampires but my brain was working in weird and convoluted ways today.

I clambered down the steps, stopping when I reached the grass and bright sunlight. I took in a deep, relaxing breath, feeling slightly better. But the light was fleeting, I knew it would eventually go away. There was only one thing that truly meant safety to me these days : Edward.

I searched all my pockets but none held the small silver cell. I could feel the anxiety and terror swelling inside me once more, my breath quickening as I tried to remember where the phone was. The need to hear his velvety voice burned within me and I started to pace, trying to calm the raging emotions inside me that had suddenly flared up. I stopped to turn around a few feet away from the edge of the woods bordering the yard when I suddenly glanced up, freezing in my tracks. There, dug into the bark of a tree were 4 long marks.

"All clear." Jacob's voice called from the porch behind me but I ignored him, my gaze focused as I slowly crossed the space between myself and the tree.

"Bells?"

Jacob reached me just as I got beside the tree, his hand snagging my wrist, yanking me back before I got too close. But he was too late, I could already see what had made those marks. I was sure my hand, were it made of stone and claws, would have matched up.

"She was standing here…"

Jacob growled, his body shaking as he looked up at the house. I followed his sight and saw my bedroom window, clearly the center of this view. But Jacob wasn't aware that I hadn't been there last night, that she hadn't see anything _this_ time.

"How fresh is this scent?" I whispered.

"Couple hours," he stated, his nose wrinkling. "She's probably gone by now…"

I nodded, taking that in. My eyes couldn't help but to venture back to the woods, probing to see anything at all. How many times had she stood here, watching me? Listening to myself and Charlie inside those walls? Those flimsy walls that would never have kept her out had she wanted to get inside…

"Did she head for the water again?"

I could hear the frustration in his voice when Jacob answered, "I don't know. Sam said she didn't cross back onto our land…" Another growl erupted from his chest then, his arms quivering as he explained, "with your leeches back, this is outta our hands. I've been ordered to back down and not track her till she crosses back onto our side."

"Do you want to follow her scent?"

He glowered at me. "I _want_ to rip her to shreds for ever even thinking of harming you."

I couldn't control myself from swallowing, his words sending a shiver down my spine. His wolf was close to the surface, I could see it in his stance, the way he was hunched slightly, his muscles tensing. Charlie was at work, not in harms way and oblivious to his visitor. Edward, my safe haven, was not in town and unreachable since I couldn't find the cell he had given me. But Jacob was here.

And Jacob wanted to go into the woods after Victoria, my worst nightmare.

It didn't take me long to make the decision; I would rather follow him into those dark trees than stand another second here by myself.

"Then lets go." I grabbed his hand and braced my back, intending to pull him forward but he didn't budge. "You're already here, what could walking a few feet in there matter?" I argued, wanting to get started before my resolved fell.

His look was disbelieving. "_You_ wanna go in there after her?"

I tried to keep the quiver out of my voice when I spoke but I failed. "I wanna be where you are."

Jacob sighed deeply and let go of my hand, taking a step back. He eyed me for a couple of moments before admitting, his voice hesitant, "I could track her better in my wolf form."

When he didn't say anything else, I asked, pushing the words past my lips, "are you asking my permission?"

He knew as well as I did how I had reacted that first time in the meadow to seeing the pack. I like to think I handled myself better the second time around but that would be a lie - I had been thrown then also. But, I reasoned with myself, it was just Jacob and me here today. My Jacob, who wanted nothing more than to protect me.

He was still looking my way so I nodded faintly, giving him the go ahead. After a look around to check on the neighbors, Jacob started to pull his shirt up over his head and my eyes bugged, getting a good look at his very defined chest and shoulders.

I spun around so fast I nearly fell over in my haste. I could hear his slight chuckle and crossed my arms, cursing him in my head. I tapped my foot a few times and was about to call out for him when I could suddenly feel hot air at my neck, ruffling my hair. My entire body froze on instinct. _It's just Jacob_, I told myself, trying to relax my stance and face, trying to calm down my beating heart. There was no sound when the huge mass moved, all four paws silent and agile as he passed by and headed into the woods.

He stopped to turn then, his eyes looking into my face and I released the breath I had been holding. Jacob's warm eyes stared out of the beasts face, worried and impatient all at once. He huffed then, the sound seeming so out of place for the overly large wolf but so, _so_ Jacob that I couldn't help the eye roll I gave back. But the distraction worked and I was able to move forward, to follow him down the small path that lead deeper into the woods. My fear aside, I was able to admit that Jacob as a wolf was beautiful and fierce. The bulky mass should have been clumsy or even loud but he moved silently, almost as stealth as Edward in some ways.

I smiled faintly, knowing Jacob would hate that comparison.

I stayed at his side for a few minutes before my shoes were just too much. Every stump I tripped on, every twig I broke earned me a look from Jacob. When I nearly face planted over a root I huffed myself, reaching down to yank off Alice's forced footwear. I wanted to toss the evil things into the trees but I knew better - Alice would not be pleased. With the shoes hanging from my fingers, I turned back to start ahead once more but Jacob was eyeing me again. He looked first at my feet then back up at my face, a question in his eyes.

"What? You go bare foot all the time," I stated. When he just continued to just eye me I crossed my arms, tossing out, "it's either this or I break my neck!" I felt slightly ticked off when his huge eyes rolled around, clearly making fun of me. Annoyed, I sent him a haughty look and walked ahead, my shoes still in my hands.

But it proved to be a bad decision. The ground was hard, really hard and really cold. Within a few seconds my toes were frozen and my poor soles were in agony. My eyes were lingering on the evil heels in my hands, contemplating if it was worth it to put them back on when suddenly Jacob's nose was between my knees, his shoulders right behind me.

"Jacob," I screamed, quickly dodging away from him, the pain in my feet forgotten in my outrage over his actions. I spun, fire spitting in my eyes, to see him flat on his stomach on the ground. He was as low as he could go and barked, tipping his head back toward his back before giving me a look. I eyed his broad, strong back and paused, slowly realizing his actions.

"You want me to ride on your back?" I asked, my voice shocked. He barked again and I took that for a yes. The cold was still seeping into my frozen feet as I stood, there contemplating his offer. Finally I gave in and slowly made my way over to his side, muttering under my breath about his manners and where to _not_ put his nose.

Even with his belly on the ground, Jacob was still massively tall and I had to climb up onto his back, my hands searching for some hold in his fur. But he was warm and I clung to him as he stood back up. He smelled of trees and nature, the beach and forest all at once. Heat found its way back into my feet and I relaxed after awhile, my guard down as I watched the scenery. Jacob too was more calm and I wondered if he had relaxed cause I did or if Victoria's trail had worn off.

Of course, the thought of her name was all it took to put my walls back up and I tensed slightly, asking the hulking mass below me, "do you still smell her?"

Jacob grumbled and I took that as a yes also. We walked on a few more feet till he suddenly froze, his head jerking to the right. My body tensed as his did, my eyes turning to see what he was seeing but I noticed nothing out of the ordinary. The growl started low in his chest but it built quickly, turning ferocious and deadly. Terror, from his growl or the unknown in the forest, I wasn't sure, gripped me and I loosened my hold on his fur, setting up some.

Suddenly Jacob spun around, sensing something on the trail behind us. But I wasn't prepared for the action. My hands lost the little grip they had left and I fell, tumbling from the wolf's tall back to the hard ground below. The wind was instantly and painfully forced from my lungs and the hand I had thrown out to try and catch myself with failed, not being able to bear my weight and force from the fall.

I laid there dazed, not sure if I had heard a crack or not, but I wasn't given much more than half a second to digest this before Jacob was suddenly over me, his large form protecting me whatever was out there.

He roared again, his monstrous paws digging into the earth to grab traction. An answering growl came from back down the path while a hiss and snarl came from another entirely different direction, somewhere from up ahead of the path. There were two of them I realized, and we were trapped in between.

Jacob turned slightly then, trying to keep both directions covered while still hovering over me. Cold terror snaked through my whole body as I laid helpless on the frozen ground. Another snarl came from the tress and I gasped. They were close, too close…

_Move_, I ordered myself in my head, my brain kick starting. Forgetting the pain in my wrist and hand, I kicked myself backwards and dug with my good arm, crawling on my back to get out from under Jacob. I found my feet somehow and stood, my eyes darting for an escape route, but it was futile. Even if I did try and run, I was shoeless and a helpless klutz; I wouldn't get far. A deadly hiss came from my right and I gasped, throwing myself back against a tree in sheer fright.

Jacob backed up to me then, his body shielding me. I dug my good hand into his fur and held on, too scared to let go even though I knew he was preparing to fight to protect me. I couldn't see much past his hulking form but I could feel his muscles tense, alerting me to the fact that whatever was out there had stepped into his line of sight.

Maybe it was morbid curiosity, but I couldn't not look and see what was waiting on the other side of my protector. A slight step to the left would put me in it's eyesight. I knew Jacob would be furious with me but I had to; the unknown was too much to bare. I slowly moved to the side, my eyes wide and tearful as I looked upon my nightmare.

I gasped as they met my eyes and Jacob, seeing that as a threat roared, prepared to lunge.

"No!" I screamed, stumbling on my bare feet to grab more of his fur. "Stop Jacob!"

For once luck was on my side and I moved quickly, darting in front of his large form and blocking his lunge. Jacob pulled up short, snarling in rage. Strong, hard arms snatched me up then, their speed making it seem like I was flying away from Jacob. I was suddenly a good 30 feet away from the werewolf and I spun in the arms around me, pleading with the familiar eyes of my captor.

"Stop, don't fight with him!"

Jasper Cullen, his lips pulled back into a hiss, glanced briefly at me before looking back at Jacob, who had been intercepted by Jasper's companion, his brother.

Emmett Cullen, still as large as ever, growled low in his throat at Jacob, his body crouched and ready to spring, his hands out like claws. Instantly I was fearful for my friend, knowing how powerful and lethal Edward's brother could be.

"No, Emmett," I wailed, "he was just protecting me!" I pulled against Jasper's arms but they were made of stone, not giving an inch. "Leave him alone!" Shock seemed to flow between both vampire's and I took advantage of it, adding, "he's my friend! It's Jacob!"

Emmett, having heard the desperation in my voice, took a few steps back from Jacob, who was still growling and showing his teeth. Emmett hissed back, his stance all predator again, but he didn't move forward, much to my relief.

"Jacob," I started, trying to walk back over to him but Jasper held strong, my good arm still in his grasp. I yanked again and got a few feet before I was halted again. "Jacob calm down, it's ok," I pleaded, trying to make him see reason.

"He isn't in control," Jasper said. Jacob, having heard him, snarled in his direction and Jasper stiffened, looking like he wanted to pull me back again but I fought it, trying to go toward the wolf instead.

"Everyone calm down," I ordered, trying to gain some control. "This is just a big misunderstanding. We can all get along!" Growls and hisses assaulted me from all sides, nearly making me want to growl and hiss myself in frustration. I tried to walk forward again but got more resistance and I snapped, turning to fling at Jasper, "let me go!"

He relented, more in shock than in acceptance, and I went to Jacob, only stopping a few feet away cause Emmett was there in between us, his protective stance not as severe as before but still alert. I ignored the vampire, focusing instead on Jacob.

"Jake…shift back, it's ok…we're safe…"

He didn't shift. Instead he fixed me with the most intense stare of betrayal and anger before turning and tearing off into the forest, his roar echoing through the trees.

**TBC**

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**A/N : **So, I'm hoping to have the next chappy out soon, but I am not making too many promises; I'm sans internet right now so all posting it being done through someone else's computer, which doesn't give me a lot of time to update or answer comments - just know that I'm working on this fic and that I appreciate everyone who takes the time to read this…I'm sure most of you guys figured I would never update again…

Melissa


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